# What Halmark Cards Do Not Say



## norgeskog (Mar 23, 2005)

Not original, a friend sent these to me and could not resist sharing them:

Hear you wife left you,
how upset you must be.
But do not fret about it...
She moved in with me.

*****
Looking back over the years
that we've been together,
I cannot help but wonder...
What the **** was I thinking?

*****
Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your choice.

*****
How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?

*****
I've always wanted to have
someone to hold, 
someone to love
After having met you,
I've changed my mind.

*****
I must admit, you brought religion to my life.
I never believed in **** until I met you.

*****
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
that you're not here to ruin it for me.

*****
Congratulations on your promotion,
but before you go,
would you like to take this knife out of  my back?
You'll probably need it again.

*****
Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad
(available only in Tennessee, Kentucky, West Virginia & South Dakota

*****
Happy Birthday - you look great for your age.
Almost lifelike.

*****
When we were together,
you always said you would die for me.
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your promise.

*****
I'm so misrable without you,
it's almost like you're here.

*****
Your friends and I wanted to do 
something special for your birthday,
so we're having you put to sleep.

*****
So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoined your day.
Look at the bright side,
it is really good pay.


----------



## wasabi (Mar 23, 2005)

Very funny!


----------



## norgeskog (Mar 23, 2005)

wasabi said:
			
		

> Very funny!


 

thanks wasabi.


----------



## middie (Mar 23, 2005)

LOVE it !!!!!!


----------

