# Dining Pet Peeves



## Seven S (Sep 11, 2006)

what drives you crazy about the food you are served when eating out - either at friends' or in restaurants, i have a couple i can think of right now:

1) biting into a large chunk of ginger left behind in a dish, in stir fries or asian noodle dishes, they tend to use some chunks for flavor but are supposed to remove them.... it totally kills your palate from that point forward!

2) pasta that is not "al dente" and mushy with no "presence"

3) being served "bad wine" - the bottle of red wine that was opened two weeks ago where only a glass was served and saved for the next person to ask for wine


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## Ishbel (Sep 11, 2006)

Overcooked meat or vegetables.


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## sattie (Sep 11, 2006)

Ishbel said:
			
		

> Overcooked meat or vegetables.


 
Agreed. Overcooked veggies are the worst!


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## urmaniac13 (Sep 11, 2006)

Seven S said:
			
		

> 2) pasta that is not "al dente" and mushy with no "presence"


 
This is one of the reasons I decided not to order any pasta dishes outside Italy and prefer making them myself... 

When I bite into a piece of chicken or pork, typically something like chinese sweet and sour, battered or breaded thoroughly so what really is inside is invisible, I would find a pure chunk of fat and/or gristle, instead of meat.


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## kitchenelf (Sep 11, 2006)

One of my biggest pet peeves is when we order appetizers, salad, and an entree and they ALL come out at the same time - nothing gets to me more!!!!!  ...but I'll probably think of more that are equally as annoying.


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## Andy M. (Sep 11, 2006)

kitchenelf said:
			
		

> One of my biggest pet peeves is when we order appetizers, salad, and an entree and they ALL come out at the same time - nothing gets to me more!!!!! ...but I'll probably think of more that are equally as annoying.


 

This has infuriated me for ever.  I believe it's because they want to get you in and out quickly and turn the table over for another paying customer.

I have gotten into the habit of not ordering the whole meal at once.  We'll order drinks and when they come, we order apps.  Later on we order the entrées.  It's the only way I can be sure of controlling the tempo of the meal.  I don't always do this as sometimes we skip apps or are OK with a quicker meal.


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## unmuzzleme (Sep 11, 2006)

...when the waiter/waitress refills my water glass several times before the entrees come out, without asking.  Maybe this is my fault, since I never say, "Please don't." I am a compulsive drinker of water, so I always seem to fill up on water and not enjoy my meal.

Also, when the waiter/waitress interrupts what is clearly an animated and engrossing conversation to ask if he/she can refill your water or something.


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## urmaniac13 (Sep 11, 2006)

Andy M. said:
			
		

> This has infuriated me for ever. I believe it's because they want to get you in and out quickly and turn the table over for another paying customer..


 
Wow, sometimes we have the opposite problem in restaurants in Italy.  We would finish a course and then have to wait, wait, and wait until the next course comes out finally.  It can be equally annoying!!  



			
				Andy M. said:
			
		

> I have gotten into the habit of not ordering the whole meal at once. We'll order drinks and when they come, we order apps. Later on we order the entrées. It's the only way I can be sure of controlling the tempo of the meal. I don't always do this as sometimes we skip apps or are OK with a quicker meal.


 
Clever, but a nightmare for the waiter & the kitchen!! Tip them good, Andy


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## lulu (Sep 11, 2006)

Overattentive service is as annoying as bad service. If I need somethng else or its not fine I'll say, to check a couple of times is fine, but more than once per course....???  And to ask when you all have your mouths full?   Or when waiting staff loitre and listen in....makes me mad!  I think some people are bless with charm - these guys make excellent service staff, if you are not one of those lucky few then don't draw attention to it and be discreet in your service!

Apart from that, unless there is something glaringly wrong with the meal, I still get a buzz when I eat out, and forgive a lot , which my husband thinks is hilarious, but its part of it, that glimmer of excitement and making an effort.  Whether its a local joint or a smart place I llike it, if I don't get that buzz one day I'll stop eating out.


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## Andy M. (Sep 11, 2006)

urmaniac13 said:
			
		

> Wow, sometimes we have the opposite problem in restaurants in Italy. We would finish a course and then have to wait, wait, and wait until the next course comes out finally. It can be equally annoying!!
> 
> *I guess you have to adapt to your surroundings!  We don't often have that problem here.*
> 
> ...


 
_*It's the waiter and/or the kitchen that creates my nightmare in the first place!  *_

_*However, I always want to tip generously because that means I've had an enjoyable dining experience.*_


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## FryBoy (Sep 11, 2006)

Smokers.

Service that's too quick (food arrives 1 minute after you sit down, while you're still enjoying your drink, main course arrives while you're still eating salad, or in one case guacamole that came between the main course and dessert).

Service that's too slow (30 minutes for a steak?). 

Service that's too friendly ("Hi! I'm Twit, and I'll be your server tonight! How's the wife and kids? How 'bout them Dodgers?").

Service that's rude (e.g., tossing the plate in front of you, forgetting the bread, ignoring the water glass).

Service that's overly attentive (I used to go to a restaurant where the busboy filled the water glasses and cleaned the unused ashy trays literally ever 2 minutes).

Service that disappears after bringing the food.

Service that promptly removes the dishes from each diner as they finish rather than awaiting until everyone is done (makes the slow eaters feel rushed, embarrasses the fast eaters).

Excessive air conditioning or heat.

Loud music.

Loud talkers. 

Cellphones and the idiots who take or make calls at their table.

Rooms that are too bright or too dark (dinner only).

Rooms that are so noisy you can't hear your dinner companions speak.

Over-priced wine list (2 times retail is acceptable, 3 to 4 times or more is gouging). 

Wine list with nothing of interest yet nothing cheap. 

Lousy wine glasses (small, thick, clumsy). 

Dirty wine glasses (lipstick, for example).

Waiters who question my assessment that the wine is bad (e.g., corked).

High corkage fees (I like to bring my own wine, as do many Californians; many local restaurants here in the beach cities charge from nothing to $5 per bottle, some up to $10; $25 is more gouging, and there's one new place in Vegas that wants $75 per bottle -- I say they can sit on my corkscrew). 

Overpriced side dishes (I don't mind paying $30 for a good steak a la carte, but what's with the $8 steamed veggies and $10 baked potatoes)?

Lack of side dishes for one in up-scale restaurants (I travel on business a lot, and I often eat alone -- I don't want a pound of asparagus and a quart of scalloped potatoes with my steak, but I've encountered only one up-scale restaurant that offered to give me a half portion of each to accompany my main course).

Food that arrives cold.

Medium-rare that's medium well. 

Over cooked pasta. 

Over cooked veggies. 

Tiny portions (didn't the "spa food" trend die with disco? It should have!)

HUGE portions with HUGE prices (no wonder older people often share -- they aren't cheap, just smart -- I don't want a 28-ounce sirloin or a muffin the size of a basketball, and I hate being forced to pay for all that waste -- and all that waist, too). 

Desserts that look good but have no taste and cost $8.

Lousy apple pie.

Nothing on the dessert menu with ice cream.

Places that charge you for two desserts if you ask for a scoop of vanilla on your apple tartin. 

Dirty coffee cups. 

BAD coffee. 


So, do you understand now why I like to cook and prefer to eat at home?

Restaurants! Bah! Humbug!


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## Seven S (Sep 11, 2006)

FryBoy said:
			
		

> Cellphones and the idiots who take or make calls at their table.




AAAAAAHHHHHH !!!!!!!  These people piss me off so bad!!!


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## pdswife (Sep 11, 2006)

Paul gets cold water
I almost always drink hot water...

The wait staff fills his up time after time...even if I ask they seem to forget to refill mine.  Is it harder to carry a pot of hot water than it is to carry a pitcher of cold water?

Also... there are many times that they bring that hot boiling water ( tea water) in a water glass...how am I supposed to pick it up and drink it??  UGH!


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## Alix (Sep 11, 2006)

Holy cow FryBoy, you have quite a list there. 

I don't have any that haven't already been listed somewhere. 

Definitely agree with the cell phone thing. Boy that irritates me.


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## Shunka (Sep 11, 2006)

Hence why I almost never eat out; for many of the reasons stated above.


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## mish (Sep 11, 2006)

Since the complaint/peeves topic was started a week ago, see no reason for a part 2. As I recall we had this discussion a while back. Perhaps the two can be merged?


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## kitchenelf (Sep 11, 2006)

The way I see it one topic is about "dining out" - the other topic is what goes on in your own kitchen.  

Technically it's not a Part II - it should stand alone.


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## Seven S (Sep 11, 2006)

mish said:
			
		

> Since the complaint/peeves topic was started a week ago, see no reason for a part 2. As I recall we had this discussion a while back. Perhaps the two can be merged?



well kitchen pet peeves - the original - was to be things that happened in the kitchen that ticked you off... my original intention was to be broader and perhaps include the things about dining as well, but the respondents took over and all responses were basically about the kitchen....  so in this dining pet peeves, my intention started out as "things on your plate/in your dish that made you mad" but it took on a turn more along the lines of "dining out service that tick you off".... if you see my first post on both of these, you will see where i wanted to go with these...  i will try to be more descriptive in my future posts as to the direction i would like them to go....


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## VeraBlue (Sep 11, 2006)

Phone calls during the meal


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## Slicer (Sep 11, 2006)

Parents who do not control their precious little bundles of unrestrained energy, either ignoring them completely or telling them 'NO!" over and over before going ballistic.


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## sparrowgrass (Sep 11, 2006)

Slicer, I am with you.  I ate out last night at a very casual Chinese buffet. First, a girl old enough to know better (12?) was walking backwards, talking to someone at a table and almost dumped my plate all over me.

Then, there was a couple with a baby that they obviously thought was adorable.  And it was adorable, except it began making these amazingly loud, high pitched squeally noises, WHICH THE PARENTS ENCOURAGED!


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## FryBoy (Sep 11, 2006)

Add Slicer's complaint about uncontrolled kids to my list! 

Also these:

Dirty restrooms!

Waiters who don't hurry back when you pay with cash and there's way more change than a decent (15 to 20%) tip.

Waiters who bring the check and never return for the credit card.

Waiters who bring the credit card thingy back to the table, but don't provide a pen.

Butter in foil wrappers (a lobbyist friend of mine once tried to get a bill through the California legislature outlawing this obscene practice).

Places that pour balsamic vinegar in the olive oil! I don't want no stinking vinegar on my bread!

Places that stick the over-chilled Chardonnay in an ice bucket.

Places that don't supply an ice bucket for the white wine.

Waiters who can't remove the cork from the wine bottle.

Perfume!!!!!!!!!!!!

Waiters who push yesterday's fish as "today's special."

Having to ask for the pepper grinder.

Having to ask for the Parmesan. 

Stale bread!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Owner's who wander by and ask "how's everything," then don't wait for an answer. 

People who b*itch about everything!


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## Robo410 (Sep 11, 2006)

I can certainly say ditto to any of those listed above. However, I expect a different quality of food when going 4star than when I go to the diner. But what I expect anywhere I go to eat and often don't find is a waitperson who knows what the establishment is serving. I don't care if it is Le FrouFrou Chien or Crackerbarrell...know the difference in clam chowder types and know what you are serving TODAY! Know the difference between loin and tenderloin and don't get them mixed up! 

Eating at a non-descript waterside place in small town mid-state California, the waitstaffer told us of the specials of the day, When I ordered off the regular menu, she kindly but firmly repeated, "the FRESH special is Pacific Oysters." When I inquired of the selection I had made she once again insisted, "Sir the FRESH selection today is the oysters." I had the oysters, They were spectacular. I don't know if the rest of the menu came from the freezer or the garbage scow, but I was directed by a knowing waitstaffer to wonderful fresh local seafood.


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## BigDog (Sep 11, 2006)

Mrs. Big Dog and I don't dine out much, and when we do, we don't tend to frequent "finer" dining establishments. Our "fine dining out" is Olive Garden or similar, usually.

As for pet peeves, pretty much all that has been mentioned here. I can't think of anything else. My biggest are the closeness of courses, or on the other hand the length of time waiting between courses, and waiting for refills. There have been a few times I have actually gone myself to the server station to fill my water. I understand servers are busy, but if they can't stand the heat, get out of the dining room. Having been a server myself at a family restaurant, perhaps I critique a bit more heavily then others. I recall the best tip I got came after I decided to dump the pitcher of ice water (by accident of course) on one of the guests. Prior to apologizing (and providing napkins/towels), I said that the bath was on the house. I figured I blew the tip, and just assumed I wasn't getting one. Percentagewise, it was the largest tip I got.

Of course, the grand daddy of them all is improperly cooked food. I've been lucky and not really had this problem, but I recall the one time I did, the server impressed me. I ordered a NY Strip medium to medium well, and it came out well crusted but once I cut in to it, it was moo-ing at me. I didn't even have to point it out to the server, that's how bad it was. The server asked if I wanted to talk to a manager, and I said yes. She cleared my plate, brought it to the kitchen, and hollered out "Who the h*ll is responsible for this? I kinda laughed until the manager came and offered to take a buck or two off the bill. I ate the veggie and pilaf of a $12 some dollar plate, and it still cost me $10 bucks?!?!? While swearing I'd never eat there again, I said whatever. I then went to pay for the bill and the server rang me out. She asked what the manager said and I told her. She was appalled, and took another $5 or off. I got a total of $8 off the bill, which joined the server's tip for the efforts.

Another thing that drives me insane is multiple servers. I understand for large parties, but for a small party? TGI Friday's always seems to do this. Between drinks, appetizer, main course, and primary server, you often see 4 different people. Who the heck gets the tip? That really p*sses me off.


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## FryBoy (Sep 11, 2006)

BigDog said:
			
		

> Our "fine dining out" is Olive Garden or similar, usually.


 
I shall light a candle for you.

Maybe two.


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## Robo410 (Sep 11, 2006)

sparrowgrass, you live in the St Louis Arch?


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## Andy M. (Sep 11, 2006)

FryBoy said:
			
		

> ...Service that's too friendly ("Hi! I'm Twit, and I'll be your server tonight! How's the wife and kids? How 'bout them Dodgers?").
> 
> ...Service that promptly removes the dishes from each diner as they finish rather than awaiting until everyone is done (makes the slow eaters feel rushed, embarrasses the fast eaters)...
> 
> ...


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## FryBoy (Sep 11, 2006)

I thought of a couple of others that irk the h*ll out of me, most related to daily specials:

Waiters who don't tell you the specials.

Waiters who tell you the specials but with such a heavy accent that you have no idea what they're saying.

Waiters who tell you the specials in Italian, or Greek, or German, or Chinese, without translating into English, as if you should speak the language.

Waiters who tell you the specials, but then 20 minutes later you overhear another waiter telling another table about the specials, and he lists half a dozen that your waiter never mentioned.

Waiters who tell you about the specials but never mention the prices, and when the check comes, you learn that what's special about the halibut is that is costs more than the lobster.

Specials written on a blackboard in a strange script that requires a Rosetta stone to decipher.

Specials written on a blackboard that's 50 feet away and perpendicular to your table.

Specials inserted in my menu that differ from those inserted in my wife's menu. 

Dirty tablecloths. Yuck!

Dirty silverware. Double yuck!

Dirty menus. BLEH!

At least if you go out to dinner with me, you have the joy of endless kvetching!


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## pdswife (Sep 12, 2006)

lol...next time we should just let Fryboy write the list for us.

I think you came up with everything FB.


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## licia (Sep 12, 2006)

We seem to have a knack for attracting noisy children or even grownups nearby. If I hear them as we are being seated, we ask for another area, but sometimes they come in afterward and really ruin what could be a nice time.  Another thing that really gets me is if the waiter or waitress talks only to dh as though I weren't there (playing for a larger tip, I think) I try not to think about that if I'm doing the paying, but it does strike a nerve.


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## DaCook (Sep 12, 2006)

Andy M. said:
			
		

> This has infuriated me for ever. I believe it's because they want to get you in and out quickly and turn the table over for another paying customer.
> 
> I have gotten into the habit of not ordering the whole meal at once. We'll order drinks and when they come, we order apps. Later on we order the entrées. It's the only way I can be sure of controlling the tempo of the meal. I don't always do this as sometimes we skip apps or are OK with a quicker meal.


for us in the kitchen it never fails to amaze me that the server (usually the bar server) doesn't pick up the appies until they are almost cold, and the main is almost ready... Now THAT ticks me off.


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## licia (Sep 12, 2006)

One thing that really helps us get served right away (if the waiter is male) is to have our grandaughter with us. She is 25 and a real looker. We get served before others usually, our needs are taken care of and when we went to Olive Garden they gave us a huge pile of chocolate mints, not the 2 apiece the girls usually give. That isn't right, but we didn't complain.


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## Chopstix (Sep 12, 2006)

When the waiter returns after a long time, only to tell me they've run out of my order, especially if it's my main course.  They should know what dishes are running low and should forewarn the customer and get back to the customer immediately before taking the order.  Grrrr.


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## sparrowgrass (Sep 12, 2006)

Robo410 said:
			
		

> sparrowgrass, you live in the St Louis Arch?


 
Don't be silly, Robo. The Arch isn't even close to being the highest point in MO.  

I am in Iron County. About 5 miles south and west of me is Taum Sauk Mountain, all 1772 feet of it.

The top of the arch is about 1100 feet above sea level.


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## Andy M. (Sep 12, 2006)

DaCook said:
			
		

> for us in the kitchen it never fails to amaze me that the server (usually the bar server) doesn't pick up the appies until they are almost cold, and the main is almost ready... Now THAT ticks me off.


 

I hear you.  That makes the kitchen look bad when it's not your doing.


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## FryBoy (Sep 12, 2006)

Thought of a couple more during the night (I'm a bitter old man):

Waiters who obsessively pour the wine every time they walk by the table -- it's really a ploy to get you to drink it all before the meal is over so you'll order more. Plus my wife gets ticked off because I get more than she does because I eat and drink too fast.

Red wine that is warm.

Waiters who don't know what the soup of the day is.

Hot soup that isn't hot.

Iced butter that can't be spread until dessert arrives.

Food that arrives in shifts -- first mine, then my wife's 5 minutes later, especially if there's no apology or explanation from the waiter. 

Tables or chairs that wobble.

Booths that are uncomfortably close to the table (I'm 6 feet, 210 pounds).

Booths that are too far away from the table, forcing you to choose between sitting on the edge of the seat or dropping food on your lap. 

Tiny tables for two that are crowded with salt, pepper, sugar, fake sugar, flowers, wine glasses, water glasses, etc., leaving no room for the breadbasket once the food arrives. 

Cockroaches on the floor, wall, or table; bugs in the food (my wife once found a gnat in her salad, sent it back, and got a new salad with -- that's right -- a new gnat).

Noticing the "Grade B" sign in the window as we leave, or worse, a "Grade C" (the county health department here rates restaurants on cleanliness). 

People who are rude to the wait staff -- my wife's uncle, a very wealthy jackass of a man, delighted in abusing waiters, not just teasing them, but being downright mean to them for the pure fun of it.

Based on this thread, I'm thinking of starting a consulting business called "What's Wrong With This Dump."


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## expatgirl (Sep 13, 2006)

If you were to ask my mother-in-law it was the time she was in a small, quaint hilltop restaurant in a small quaint country (which will go unmentioned) and a flock of 3 chickens came galloping  out from under the kitchen's swinging  door followed by a knife wielding chef.  She lost all appetite.


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## expatgirl (Sep 13, 2006)

licia said:
			
		

> We seem to have a knack for attracting noisy children or even grownups nearby. If I hear them as we are being seated, we ask for another area, but sometimes they come in afterward and really ruin what could be a nice time.  Another thing that really gets me is if the waiter or waitress talks only to dh as though I weren't there (playing for a larger tip, I think) I try not to think about that if I'm doing the paying, but it does strike a nerve.



I totally agree with you, Licia,

Nothing amazes me more than parents who bring young children to a restaurant and have nothing to entertain them with.  I had 2 active children when they were young (my son was ADD) and we never went to anywhere without having boatloads of stuff for them to do.  If they did act up (which was rarely) out the door they went---we were too conscious of the people  around us spending money to enjoy their evenings out to have it ruined by our children.


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## college_cook (Sep 13, 2006)

I hate when they kitchen gets too sloppy to properly trim their meats of fat... or when I pay for a good steak, and 40% of it is fat... and then they try to tell me it is well marbled!  I don't ever really order steak when I'm out anymore.

One other thing too, I like my silverware to be flawlessly shiny.  I know they are only water spots, but they don't look nice...


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## Dina (Sep 13, 2006)

Overcooked food and oversalted is my biggest pet peeve.


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## TATTRAT (Sep 13, 2006)

I don't like being rushed. 

And I don't like when the waiter/tress want to tell you thier whole life story and try and get too chummy...unless I/someone at the table, has initiated the conversation.

I also hate when a group of us will go out, and people order the same things, I mean c'mon, everyone get something different and share! Am I alone on this?


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## lulu (Sep 13, 2006)

I remembered something i HATED.  We went with a friend to clebrate his birthday, about 16 of us to a restaurant in Covent Garden.  Some other people came at the end for pudding and champagne, 3 of them.  

The person I sat next to bought a girlfriend who  spoke no English, so we were all speaking both in english and French, because not everybody spoke french either. It was frustrating telling the same jokes and anecdotes twice in a row, lol  She did not know anyone, and I thought it was uncomfortable to bring her to this particular even under the circustances.  Then, these same tow did not order a first course, instead helped them selves to MINE!  I mean, they did ask, but I could not say no, so I got literally one bite of what I had ordered. They also helped them selves to "tastes" of my main meal and pudding.  This was the first time I had met these people.  

Normally I agree, tattrat, you share and share a like, but I kind of like to be asked, not told. and I like to have some of the food I ordered; and some of theirs, lol!
THEN at the end, everybody got sticky about dividing the bill, the people who came for pudding and champagne tried to not pay for the champagne,  and the two people who ate my food ...saying they were paying less because they did not have a starter.  Had it not been my friends birthday I might have said something!

In the end the birthday boy and my husband picked up the excess. Made me hoppng mad.  If you come to wish someone happy birthday you kind of don't expect them to pay for you if its agreed before hand we all go dutch.  If you don;'t have a starter or whatever, well, I think tough luck.  Its a PARTY.  if you can't afford it say before you come, or DON"T COME!
Ooh, I am angry all over again about that meal now!


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## middie (Sep 13, 2006)

Anyone who slurps !!


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## Alix (Sep 13, 2006)

Ooooooooooo middie, you reminded me! 

Someone who blows their nose really loudly behind you. UGH!


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## Andy M. (Sep 13, 2006)

Alix said:
			
		

> Ooooooooooo middie, you reminded me!
> 
> Someone who blows their nose really loudly behind you. UGH!


 

Excuse me! I had a cold that day!


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## Katie H (Sep 13, 2006)

At the moment, I can't really think of any dining pet peeves I have, but if you want a really entertaining food read, pick up Alan Richman's _Fork It Over:  The Intrepid Adventures of a Professional Eater._  It's his true commentary of eating EVERYTHING all over the world.  It's truly funny. http://www.amazon.com/Fork-Over-Int...=pd_bbs_1/103-3721627-9356620?ie=UTF8&s=books


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## GB (Sep 13, 2006)

I do not have any that have not already been mentioned, but Fryboy, I have a follow up question for you...Have you ever been out to eat where you have not been disappointed ? That is a mighty long list of pet peeves 9not to say that you are wrong about any of them).


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## BreezyCooking (Sep 13, 2006)

GB - you beat me to it!!! Fryboy - I'd be interested to hear if there's any place you've dined where you haven't found something wrong.  Do the restaurants in your area have your picture posted?  

Seriously, I'm not saying that anyone should have to put up with poor food/service, but let's be realistic.  Once you start listing things like "a/c is too cold; heat is too hot", etc., etc., your complaints start to lose a lot of oomph.  As you yourself said - you do sound like a "bitter old man".  How do you ever enjoy dining out?  I hope for the sake of your dining companions that you don't bring all these things up while everyone is trying to enjoy their meal - or do you find yourself dining out alone a lot lately.


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## SizzlininIN (Sep 13, 2006)

Andy M. said:
			
		

> I have gotten into the habit of not ordering the whole meal at once. We'll order drinks and when they come, we order apps. Later on we order the entrées. It's the only way I can be sure of controlling the tempo of the meal. I don't always do this as sometimes we skip apps or are OK with a quicker meal.


 
Great idea Andy M. I'm putting this in the memory bank for our next nice meal out....thats one that really gets me.

Over or undercooked food

Or when I order iced tea and it get it just sweetened right and I leave the table for something and I come back and the waitress refilled my partially dranked glass with more tea.....errrr!  I've just finally stopped ordering it. 

When an over eager waiter/waitress returns to your table excessively to check on you.  And on the other hand one that takes your order and you have to hunt her down for other things or ask another waitress/waiter. 

Unrulely children

People that chew with their mouth open or smack their lips


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## licia (Sep 13, 2006)

And on the other hand one that takes your order and you have to hunt her down for other things or ask another waitress/waiter. 

Where do they go when they don't return for ages? I don't know much about how a restaurant staff operates, but do they actually seat and serve guests and leave?  I do remember one in a diner type restaurant had an emergency call from home and left, but I don't think that would happen often. I think they must be talking with others and forget some of the tables. Is it ok to "forget" the tip in such an occasion?


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## Ellen (Sep 13, 2006)

LOL, all the above,  I laughed like a drain over this thread.  I didn't laugh the day a waitress dropped a glass of red wine over me and the owners were at the bar, saw it, and laughed.  We were going to stay there to, but the room stunk of stale tobacco.  I coped with the wine, but the meal was so salty we couldn't eat it.   We walked out.  But really we have had more goods  than bads.  I hate hoverers, honkers, and howling brats.  And I have never heard of bringing an entire order at  the same time.


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## Ellen (Sep 13, 2006)

I forgot about hiders.  Lulu, those people at Covent Garden sound truly revolting.  I don't mind sharing with family and close friends, but otherwise don't even think of touching my plate unless I am finished, then eat what's left if you feel you must.  My first reaction would be to push the plate away and tell them to eat it if they must, but don't expect me to play trough games with them.  Utterley disgusting.  My intention would be to embarrass them.  It has never happened to me though.  ;Þ


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## middie (Sep 13, 2006)

Everything I wanted to say has already been said lol


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## luvs (Sep 13, 2006)

canned veggies. 'cept peas.


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## Claire (Sep 14, 2006)

I go with the "bad children" camp of thought.  I avoid any restaurant that bills itself as a "family restaurant" and avoid "fast food" places.  So when I'm paying top dollar to dine at a premium-type restaurant, I don't expect to find children playing tag, tripping the waiters, wailing, etc.  In that vein, when I dine out and see a particularly great family with the children obviously feelling like they're getting a great treat and having fun "pretending" to be adults, I make a point of stopping by the table if I haven't caught Mom in the loo, and complimenting them on their kids' great manners.  Whenever I've done this, I get beaming looks from Mom & Dad.  Hey, I know it isn't easy to get those kids to behave, and sometimes the family needs a compliment!


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## expatgirl (Sep 14, 2006)

Claire said:
			
		

> I go with the "bad children" camp of thought.  I avoid any restaurant that bills itself as a "family restaurant" and avoid "fast food" places.  So when I'm paying top dollar to dine at a premium-type restaurant, I don't expect to find children playing tag, tripping the waiters, wailing, etc.  In that vein, when I dine out and see a particularly great family with the children obviously feelling like they're getting a great treat and having fun "pretending" to be adults, I make a point of stopping by the table if I haven't caught Mom in the loo, and complimenting them on their kids' great manners.  Whenever I've done this, I get beaming looks from Mom & Dad.  Hey, I know it isn't easy to get those kids to behave, and sometimes the family needs a compliment!



Me, too, Claire,

I've done the complimenting  on other's children now that my children are grown and been complimented on my own when they were young.   It's a nice warm, fuzzy feeling all the way around.  Children will meet standards set for them----adults have to set them.


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## luvs (Sep 14, 2006)

yep, add me to that list. i live in a rich city so we don't have fast-food-joints nearby. whew. plenty of other restaurants!


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## GB (Sep 14, 2006)

One thing that I constantly see when we have threads like this one are conflicting statements. Here is what I mean by that. For some people they do not like when they have to wait for their water glass to be filled, but other people can not stand when their water glass is filled frequently. Some people can't stand when dirty plates are left on the table, while others can't stand that some peoples plates are cleared when the entire dining party is not done yet.

Something we need to keep in mind (for our waiters and waitresses sake) is that everyone is different. what one person expects, someone else will expect the opposite. 

Of course this is only true for some things. I do not think there is anyone who enjoys the children who are misbehaving or the waiter who gets the orders wrong and doesn't seem to care or other things like that.


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## kimbaby (Sep 14, 2006)

When the waitress/waiter doesn't service enough or to much...
When one tries to talk you into ordering something you do not want...
or when the waitress makes a fuss when you want to send something back
due to it not being prepard correctly,which really is the cooks fault...


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## GB (Sep 14, 2006)

This one happened to us last night and bothered me enough that I will not be going back to that restaurant anytime soon. 

Both my wife and I ordered burgers to be cooked medium. I actually prefer mine a little more on the med rare side, but I always order med in a restaurant because they always screw it up anyway.

Well we got our burgers and mine was well done and my wifes was rare. Talk about inconsistent!


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## FryBoy (Sep 14, 2006)

GB said:
			
		

> I do not have any that have not already been mentioned, but Fryboy, I have a follow up question for you...Have you ever been out to eat where you have not been disappointed ? That is a mighty long list of pet peeves 9not to say that you are wrong about any of them).


Don't be silly, GB! Is there one pet peeve I've listed that you actually like in a restaurant? Somehow I doubt it. 

You'd have to be a Pollyanna not to notice flaws in just about any restaurant -- "perfect" is an elusive goal, but I don't expect perfection. In judging just about anything in life, one must balance the positives against the negatives, and in the restaurants I prefer, the good points greatly outweigh the bad. If the food, service, atmosphere, and price are good, minor flaws don't matter, but when those flaws eclipse the positives, I don't return. 

I'm critical and I expect someone to be paying attention to the details, particularly when I'm paying a lot for the pleasure of eating in their restaurant, and I don't reward incompetence or negligence with my repeat business. I doubt you do either.


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## FryBoy (Sep 14, 2006)

BreezyCooking said:
			
		

> GB - you beat me to it!!! Fryboy - I'd be interested to hear if there's any place you've dined where you haven't found something wrong. Do the restaurants in your area have your picture posted?
> 
> Seriously, I'm not saying that anyone should have to put up with poor food/service, but let's be realistic. Once you start listing things like "a/c is too cold; heat is too hot", etc., etc., your complaints start to lose a lot of oomph. As you yourself said - you do sound like a "bitter old man". How do you ever enjoy dining out? I hope for the sake of your dining companions that you don't bring all these things up while everyone is trying to enjoy their meal - or do you find yourself dining out alone a lot lately.


Really! You ever eat in a restaurant with the temperature set to 60 degrees and blowing on you, or no A/C and the temperature in the 80s? That's just a sign of neglect by the owner or manager. Some people may prefer to pretend that everything in live is just peachy, but I'm not one of them.

BTW, I found your response to be pointedly rude -- adding a smiley face doesn't change that. If I had posted such a response, I'm sure I would have received a PM from one of the administrators.


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## FryBoy (Sep 14, 2006)

GB said:
			
		

> I do not think there is anyone who enjoys the children who are misbehaving....


I don't know about that, GB. I've seen parents go ballistic when anyone dares to suggest that their child shouldn't by lying in the middle of the floor, throwing food, or screaming at the top of their lungs.


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## GB (Sep 14, 2006)

FryBoy said:
			
		

> Really! You ever eat in a restaurant with the temperature set to 60 degrees and blowing on you, or no A/C and the temperature in the 80s? That's just a sign of neglect by the owner or manager.


This just goes to my point about each person being different. The temp that you find uncomfortable the person at the next table might find perfect. My wife has been known to put on a sweater when the temp is in the 80's while I am stripped down as far as I can legally go.


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## GB (Sep 14, 2006)

FryBoy said:
			
		

> I don't know about that, GB. I've seen parents go ballistic when anyone dares to suggest that their child shouldn't by lying in the middle of the floor, throwing food, or screaming at the top of their lungs.


Sorry, I meant to say with the exception of the parents of said kids lol.


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## GB (Sep 14, 2006)

FryBoy said:
			
		

> Don't be silly, GB! Is there one pet peeve I've listed that you actually like in a restaurant? Somehow I doubt it.


That is why I said "not to say that you are wrong about any of them". Although there are a few I would not put on my list personally. 

I was just trying to joke around with you a little bit FryBoy


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## ronjohn55 (Sep 14, 2006)

GB said:
			
		

> while I am stripped down as far as I can legally go.


 
OK, this is bordering on too much info!!!   

John


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## Seven S (Sep 14, 2006)

GB said:
			
		

> One thing that I constantly see when we have threads like this one are conflicting statements. Some people can't stand when dirty plates are left on the table, while others can't stand that some peoples plates are cleared when the entire dining party is not done yet.



that is why being a restauranteur is such a hard job, because pleasing some people will inevitably mean pissing other people off... i  have worked in restaurants where there were different policies on this, slow eaters feel rushed when others' plates are cleared, fast eaters get annoyed at having finished and having to stare at their pork chop bones in front of them for 20 more minutes...  just as in life, you have to do what you believe is most appropriate and expect the fact that you cannot please everyone


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## SizzlininIN (Sep 14, 2006)

Claire said:
			
		

> I go with the "bad children" camp of thought. I avoid any restaurant that bills itself as a "family restaurant" and avoid "fast food" places. So when I'm paying top dollar to dine at a premium-type restaurant, I don't expect to find children playing tag, tripping the waiters, wailing, etc. In that vein, when I dine out and see a particularly great family with the children obviously feelling like they're getting a great treat and having fun "pretending" to be adults, I make a point of stopping by the table if I haven't caught Mom in the loo, and complimenting them on their kids' great manners. Whenever I've done this, I get beaming looks from Mom & Dad. Hey, I know it isn't easy to get those kids to behave, and sometimes the family needs a compliment!


 
As a child my parents took my 5 siblings and myself for family dining on Sundays.  We grew up with manners and were expected to behave appropriately when we were out in public, including the dining table.  Many times people stopped and complimented my parents that we were well behaved children.  Little did they know that we'd get the wrath if we stepped out of line.  All it took was a look from my dad and he could send you in tears.


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## SizzlininIN (Sep 14, 2006)

GB said:
			
		

> One thing that I constantly see when we have threads like this one are conflicting statements. Here is what I mean by that. For some people they do not like when they have to wait for their water glass to be filled, but other people can not stand when their water glass is filled frequently. Some people can't stand when dirty plates are left on the table, while others can't stand that some peoples plates are cleared when the entire dining party is not done yet.
> 
> Something we need to keep in mind (for our waiters and waitresses sake) is that everyone is different. what one person expects, someone else will expect the opposite.
> 
> Of course this is only true for some things. I do not think there is anyone who enjoys the children who are misbehaving or the waiter who gets the orders wrong and doesn't seem to care or other things like that.


 
I see your point GB. But surely the wait staff can tell that the customer is getting discouraged upon their frequent returns.  Should I point this out to them then and assure them if we need anything that we will let them know?  That would probably tick them off I'd think.  So its a tricky thing.  Either I take the brunt and deal with the annoyance or point it out and then oink them off.


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## Snoop Puss (Sep 14, 2006)

Now here's an admission: I hate eating out with my partner! He uses it as an excuse to canvas the staff's opinions on all kinds of issues. Fortunately, most people cope with it well, much better than I do in fact! They're only doing a job for the money, they're not experts on all the local politicians, house prices, you name it, he'll ask it!

Thank god for the dishwasher and for the fact that we live in a relatively quiet area, making it far more complicated to eat out than in.


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## CharlieD (Sep 14, 2006)

I hate the stake that was not seasoned before grilling, and then you are offres slat to salt and pepper to "adjust" the seasoning. Adjust what, there is no seasoning to begin with, grrrrrrrrrrrrrr


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## Corkscrew (Sep 14, 2006)

I think GB's point about different strokes for different folks is right on target, but in my experience, the service in top restaurants is remarkably similar. There is an accepted standard for service, but too few places bother to teach their staff what is expected or to supervise them.


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## ronjohn55 (Sep 14, 2006)

SizzlininIN said:
			
		

> I see your point GB. But surely the wait staff can tell that the customer is getting discouraged upon their frequent returns.


 
If they're even the same people! Our FORMERLY favorite brewpub was like that! Every time, the majority of the waitstaff was new. We finally got fed up after an inexcusably bad episode, and haven't been back since. We also warn anyone who asks about the place to stay away. 

(And as a brewer, I usually have a real interest in seeing a local brewpub succeed!)

John


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## luvs (Sep 14, 2006)

yeah, overcooked/underseasoned steak. uck.


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## Ellen (Sep 14, 2006)

How true.  Something that really gets on one persons wick, simply does not faze another.  I have never sent a meal back,  I have simply not eaten what I don't care for.  Then I will pay, but not go back.  There is no doubt in my mind that a good waiter is an extra dish.


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## Opiñanita (Sep 14, 2006)

Being a server for many years myself, I find myself pretty lenient and understanding when service seems off. Maybe the salad kitchen is much slower that the entree kitchen, maybe a bunch of tables just got sat in your section and your trying to get to everyone, maybe the owner is watching you and you're trying to look busy, or maybe the other waiter you're working with is just not a great waiter and you're trying to make up for his/her downfalls. I guess what I'm saying is that it takes a lot to make me upset about a meal because I always try to asses the situation of the restaurant and be open about what could be going on.
However one pet peeve of mine is when your meal takes forever and your waiter or waitress doesn't keep you informed about what happened with your meal. That really makes me mad. We had an experience once where the waitress took our order and we waited 45 minutes for burgers. The place wasn't particularly busy, but thing is, we never could get our waitress to come back to our table to see what was going on. We tried making eye contact, saying "excuse me", in the end we communicated with another waitress and the manager came out and apologized.  In the end, our meals were compted. I didn't even want to leave a tip for the waitress because I was so upset. And I usually always tip 20%.


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## Claire (Sep 15, 2006)

As to the conflicting statements comments, yeah, I understand, but sometimes a restaurant owner has to take a realistic look at who their target customer is, and are they really out there, who is bringing in the $$$.  If your customers are all going to be having 3-8 year olds, well, get with the program.  If they are going to be 60-80, turn up the thermostat, but I won't be there, because I don't like eating through a sheen of sweat.  

But I'll go with a pet peeve that really, really irritates.  Your staff who are 16-35 years old don't get to select the music and the level it is played at if your customers are 50+.  Actually go out into your dining room occaisionally.  If rap is playing at high volume and there are 50 people in the dining room, all of whom are over 50, you have a serious problem. Some are so so-called "polite" that they'll eat your delicious food, but they won't be back.  If the under-21 crowd aren't paying your bills, don't let them select the music.  A few times we've ordered drinks, expecting to order our dinners as we drank them, and just asked to have our bills.  "Something wrong with the menu?"  No, we just actually were planning to speak over our meal.  One waitress at one place actually said that they couldn't help it, that customers had put it in the juke box.  Well, I know that the juke box volume is controlled by the management, and on top of it, there wasn't anyone young enough in the restaurant besides the employees who would like the music being blasted.


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## expatgirl (Sep 16, 2006)

Claire, you've hit a pet peeve of mine as well.  I don't mind most kinds of music as long as it's not ringing my eardrums (okay I hate rap especially the kind with the dirty words being repeated 40 million times)  but other than that I will  tolerate just about anything but don't make me go deaf over it.  In my crabby old early 50's  I just ask them in a firm voice, "Could you please turn that down--I've really got a headache" I've never had a problem--sure the youngsters look surprised that you  could possibly not enjoy losing your hearing but that's life!


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## luvs (Sep 16, 2006)

Claire said:
			
		

> As to the conflicting statements comments, yeah, I understand, but sometimes a restaurant owner has to take a realistic look at who their target customer is, and are they really out there, who is bringing in the $$$. If your customers are all going to be having 3-8 year olds, well, get with the program. If they are going to be 60-80, turn up the thermostat, but I won't be there, because I don't like eating through a sheen of sweat.
> 
> But I'll go with a pet peeve that really, really irritates. Your staff who are 16-35 years old don't get to select the music and the level it is played at if your customers are 50+. Actually go out into your dining room occaisionally. If rap is playing at high volume and there are 50 people in the dining room, all of whom are over 50, you have a serious problem. Some are so so-called "polite" that they'll eat your delicious food, but they won't be back. If the under-21 crowd aren't paying your bills, don't let them select the music. A few times we've ordered drinks, expecting to order our dinners as we drank them, and just asked to have our bills. "Something wrong with the menu?" No, we just actually were planning to speak over our meal. One waitress at one place actually said that they couldn't help it, that customers had put it in the juke box. Well, I know that the juke box volume is controlled by the management, and on top of it, there wasn't anyone young enough in the restaurant besides the employees who would like the music being blasted.


 
sounds like you're dining in local pubs, rather than quality restaurants. i'm only 25 & intend to own a restaurant quite soon- maybe a few yrs. from today, Lord willing, & i'd send an employee on thier way if i heard such music in my restaurant. age & hospitality are seperate entities.


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## buckytom (Sep 16, 2006)

fryboy, i hope you realize that you are a restaurant's nightmare. the constant victim of negligence or circumstance. (notice no smileys).

the next time you sit down and you feel the ac blowing on you, ask for another seat right away. my wife does that all of the time. if it becomes uncomfortable during a meal, ask again. don't just sit there and become bitter about how badly you're being treated. and ask the waiter to get the admin from massachusetts at the next table to put on some clothes.  

same goes for all of the other technical improprieties you've mentioned. cold butter can always be nuked. wine temp should be poured to your liking. children can always be duct taped to a chair, and gagged. etcetera, etcetera.

of course, bad food or service is just that. but work with the wait staff, have a little patience (you don't own the place), and then tip generously if they've come close to your needs.


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## Hades (Sep 16, 2006)

My peeves that are not yet mentioned are about menu's.
First thing that's bound to get on my nerves is poetical menus. To give an example, a few weeks ago gf and I are hungry after a day in the city and we go to a nice not overly fancy looking diner. I can't remember what my gf had, but I had devillish fish in it's flavourful buttery sauce accompagnied by a marriage of potato and baby oignon. Devillish fish was a give away. It's a poetic discription of what we call "zeeduivel" (literally translated "seadevil" or monkfish in english). The flavourful buttery sauce turned out to be a beurre blanc and the marriage of potato and baby oignon was a potato and spring oignon mash. Ok, It was realy tasty but not more tasty than monkfish and spring oignon mash with beure blanc.
Closely related to the previous is cryptic descriptions and "surprise" on the menu. I love "trivial pursuit" but that doesn't mean I want a menu to be a quiz (especially not if the correct aswer doesn't yield a price). I also don't like surprises on my plate. If I'm to be surprised by anything in a restaurant, I prefer to be surprised by the quality of the ingredients mentioned on the menu, the skills of the chef who combined them into a dish and the one or two secret ingredients that make you say "wow". So please don't serve me an "asparagus surprise menu"... especially not at 80 Eur per person.
Thirdly, I like classic dishes to have the authentic ingredients without too many creative additions or omissions. For example: there is a clear distinction between a greek salad and a salade niçoise. And the distinction is much bigger than the former being a green salad with oignons and feta and the latter being a green salad with a can of tuna and a hard boiled egg.


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## GB (Sep 16, 2006)

buckytom said:
			
		

> and ask the waiter to get the admin from massachusetts at the next table to put on some clothes.


Buzzkill


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## TexanFrench (Sep 16, 2006)

Worst dining experience to date happened this summer in NYC, west of Central Park.

We (DH and I) were seated outdoors at what seemed an upscale place.  We gave our orders for drinks, were served, gave our meal orders.  We chatted together, enjoyed the summer evening, etc.  A waiter (not the original one) came with our meals, but they were not what what we had ordered.  We said so, and he took them to another table.

Then we waited. And waited. And waited.  Finally, about 40 minutes after the wrong meals had been sent to us, we were able to catch the eye of our original waiter and ask about our order. He apologized and put our order in again.  Another 30 minutes or so later, we had our food.  

While we were eating, darkness fell--and no outside lights came on!  The place was inky black.  A patron coming out from the interior of the restaurant actually tripped and fell in the doorway, where there was an unseen step going down to the pavement.

We finished our meal and asked for the check--and it was not our check!  It was obviously for a table of 4, not us.  We pointed this out to the waiter, and he eventually came up with the right check.

I did leave a tip, because I know that restaurant staff aren't usually paid enough to live on, especially in a place like NYC, but I would be very surprised if that restaurant is going to be in existence for long.


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## luvs (Sep 16, 2006)

i'd leave, if to say to them meals inadvertantly lack an unspoken etttiquette of proper preparation. sigh. i'll wear a Chef's coat so as to silently say, 'yeah, i'm a Chef, so cook my meal properly.'


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## FryBoy (Sep 16, 2006)

buckytom said:
			
		

> fryboy, i hope you realize that you are a restaurant's nightmare. the constant victim of negligence or circumstance. (notice no smileys).
> 
> the next time you sit down and you feel the ac blowing on you, ask for another seat right away. my wife does that all of the time. if it becomes uncomfortable during a meal, ask again. don't just sit there and become bitter about how badly you're being treated. and ask the waiter to get the admin from massachusetts at the next table to put on some clothes.
> 
> ...


Bucky, as they say in court, you assume facts not in evidence. Of course I ask for a different table or to have the music turned down or the A/C adjusted if the situation warrants and if it's something that can be corrected. But in well-managed restaurants, the need to complain rarely arises. 

Ignorant, inattentive restaurant management and untrained staff are the diner's worst nightmare. Diners may not own the place, as you argue, but the restaurant has no right to our business, either. Those that act like they are entitled to our business rarely last.


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## Claire (Sep 17, 2006)

Luvs, I live in a very small town.  It is a tourist town.  I recently tried to give a member of our group advice on where to eat here for a family reunion (total stranger), and she said she had a hard time finding a place (even with my help) finding a place that wasn't too noisy.  We aren't talking high-end big-city places.  We also aren't talking trashy places either.  I'm talking small, family owned places who should be smart enough to cater to their audience, so to speak.  And yes, we are a small enough town that we DO let the owners know about the problem.  My point was that the bartenders and wait staff should NOT be the ones to select the music (or for that matter, the room temperature).  Someone should actually pay attention to the customers.  Just tonight I asked a local pub owner if he would mind turning down the TV in a local place (a simple local pub), since no one was watching it.  He turned the volume OFF,since no one was watching it.  This is service.  Having an 18 year old decide the music and volume for a crowd of people who are 40-80 .... well, it is time for the owner to actually consider the concept of walking into his restauraunt.  And there are a lot of them like that.  I'm lucky; it is a small town, and what I do say matters.  I did tell restaurant owners that they lost out because ..... well, whatever.  I feel for people who spend money and have to put up with it.


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## buckytom (Sep 17, 2006)

FryBoy said:
			
		

> Bucky, as they say in court, you assume facts not in evidence. Of course I ask for a different table or to have the music turned down or the A/C adjusted if the situation warrants and if it's something that can be corrected. But in well-managed restaurants, the need to complain rarely arises.
> 
> Ignorant, inattentive restaurant management and untrained staff are the diner's worst nightmare. Diners may not own the place, as you argue, but the restaurant has no right to our business, either. Those that act like they are entitled to our business rarely last.


 
ahh, ok, sorry, mea culpa. i know several people who are perpetually miserable and can only relax after they complain about something.

agreed about well managed joints.


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## Claire (Sep 18, 2006)

I agree that there are a number of diners who live to complain.  I know quite a few.  They travel to different places for the sole purpose of being able to say that it is better where they live.  They go to restaurants simply to be able to complain about them.  As a traveller and lover of restaurants, pubs, and yes, even (maybe especially) local dives, I rarely complain and when I do, it usually works, pronto.  I have an aunt who I went to a local place with in Florida, and she immediately lit into the waitress.  The fries had to be such, the burger so, etc, followed up with "I used to be a waitress and if this isn't the way I want it you won't get a tip!"  My sisters, Mom and I were apalled.  I'm suprised the poor girl didn't leave on the spot.  Another uncle has the $$ to travel, and when he comes home does nothing but complain about the food, hotels, etc.  A bathroom down the hall sends people like this into conniption fits.  These are New Englanders, and they do nothing but gripe about how the seafood in the south (or anywhere else) doesn't measure up to _theirs.  _D'ya know what?  Spiny lobster is delicious, as is Maine lobster.  Pink, white, and gray shrimp, large prawns, are all delicious.  And rock shrimp really rocks my boat!!!  On our last trip to Florida, that was #1 on my list of things to eat.  Why some people live to complain really makes me wonder.  And when you get them in  your restaurant, I feel for you.  Here in town, for the most part, when I complain (rarely), the restaurant owners immediately fix the problem.  I simply stop frequenting the ones who don't.  Given our bar bill, and the number of guests who visit us, it is really THEIR problem, not mine.  BTW, the place where I complained about the volume of the rock music in a room where I, at 51, was the youngest paying customer, was recently purchased by a favorite restauranteur of ours.  THAT will never happen again.  THAT restauranteur knows where the $$ is, and it is with people who continue to come back, and he instinctively knows what his customers want.  AND he actually walks through his restaurants many times every night.


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## Andy M. (Sep 18, 2006)

My sister has a lifelong girlfriend.  They and their husbands go out to eat together often.  S.O. and I was unlucky enough to be invited along one Saturday night.  The girlfriend complained all night long.

"Is the coffee fresh?  If it's fresh I'll have a cup.  I hate coffee that's not fresh..."

She was intent on getting her husband to say something negative about his meal and he didn't want to.  She kept harping at him and he finally agreed with her that the steak was tough so she wouldl shut up.

That ruined my whole meal.  We won't be joining them for dinner again.


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## licia (Sep 18, 2006)

I have a sister who changes everything about her order. She also complains. I have stopped going anywhere to eat with her and if I ever have to do it again I will tell her if she changes one thing or complains about anything I will ask for another table for myself. She has done enough of that to last the rest of her life, so now she should choose something she likes and shut up!!!


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## Harborwitch (Sep 26, 2006)

Dining at home:  guests who show up, like clockwork, at dinner time.  Of course they've already had a bag of Doritos for dinner - but gee that glass of wine looks good and they're really thirsty  (swig that wine as fast as you can), well now that you insist they'll have some dinner too.  Sheesh.

Out to dinner:  Most everything's been covered.  I hate going to eat when the waitress ignores me and only make eye contact with my DH.  It happened at a new Chilis that opened nearby.  The waitress kept her back to me unless she really had to make contact with me, "what would you like (thinking "fat old lady doesn't need food" I'm sure).  Paid no attention to what I said, I guess she figured I was only going to eat the mashed potatoes so wouldn't care if my bloody rare steak was cooked so well done that it formed a dried up cup on my plate.  By God, though my husband was going to get his fajitas cooked to order.  Of course once the 4 prime pieces of beefcake were seated at a nearby table we couldn't get waited on for love nor money.  We haven't been back since and it's been over a year.


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## Marishka_20 (Oct 6, 2006)

*Agree!*

I agree with Fryboy, all of his complaints are exactly what I am thinking most of the time. So many resturants just don't have it togrther and I have had servers that looked like they hated their job and were rude. I hate service like that, it just ruins the experience and can make me angry to the point where I lose my appetite. I usually don't say anything and try to enjoy me dinning experience but sometimes you just can't. Like for instance what Licia was saying about nosiy people, I hate that. People go out to eat to relax, have a nice meal, not hear what the person sitting next to you or several tables away from you did yesterday. I remember going to a resturant and there was this man talking so loud that everyone in the resturant was looking at him. His obnoxious behavior was getting to me, and I was sitting 4 tables away. So I waited till he said something again and then answered his question, LOUDLY, and one of the ladies at his table laughed because she knew he was being to loud. After that he was definatly A LOT quieter. I have worked in many resturants, in all positions, from the dishwashser to the sever. I know how it can be back in the kitchen, it's hard work, so I try and show some patience but sometimes there is just no excuse. Like one person was talking about, where you order your drinks and then wait 30 minutes for those. Then you order your appetizer and that takes another 30-40 minutes. When they come with your appetizer you order your main dishes and you wait...30 minutes...40 minutes...an hour. So you pull your waitress aside and ask her what is taking so long and she hasn't even put your order in yet and there are only 3 tables in the resturant that have people at them. Then when you are finished and are waiting for the check the waitress doesn't come back for another hour or so. One time I just went to the front desk, got the manager, got my ticket, paid(maybe tipped), and left. I am sure that I have mentioned things that have already been mentioned before but it is just so dang aggravating that I could just keep going and end up with just as many, if not more, as Fryboy.


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## Ellen (Oct 6, 2006)

Yes Marishka,  I think a nice touch after too long a wait, is to rise and leave when you see your meal coming out the swing door.

My daughter and I went to a Pizza Hutt in Whangarei once, we didn't know the teachers were on strike.  The place was a bomb site, every table littered with dining debris, and the only occupants were two utterley exhausted young women sitting in the resto with their feet up.  It was about 3pm. The two of them looked stunned.  Lizzy and I helped ourselves to a glass of wine each as they watched.  We sat down with them.   Then the four of us got stuck in to cleaning, I cleared, Lizzy vacumned, they washed, it only took us about half an hour and the place was pristine.  Including the loos.  Then they gave us our usual crispy pepperoni, mushroom and olive pizza.  It was the best one we have ever had.  Quite fun really.


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## Nicholas Mosher (Oct 7, 2006)

1.  Chain restaurants that have become "standardized".  I avoid these like the plague.  Chili's, Applebee's, TGI Fridays, Crackerbarrel, Olive Garden, etc.  To me they're no different than McDonalds, except they serve steak.

2.  People that complain about everything, especially at a $5-$10/plate restaurant.  I love a restaurant that is casual and where people are allowed to be people.  Kids squealing, laughter, cell phones, music I might not like, etcetera doesn't bug me whatsoever.  It's the guy complaining non-stop next to me that he had a spot on the side of his glass, or that _he_ isn't leaving no stinkin' tip as he devours $35 worth of food at a $5 buffet. 

3.  Dirty bath/washrooms, or finding that there is no toilet paper after committing...    I don't mind a few crumpled paper-towels on the floor, but if I can't see myself in the mirror as I wash my hands I raise an eyebrow.

I think many people have unrealistic expectations for the average grub-hall - especially those who are fairly educated about food (most people here I assume).  When you order spaghetti and meatballs they're not going to resurrect your dead grandmother to start chopping garlic, send an A-List celebrity out with your food, and then wash/wax your vehicle as you eat (although that would be a great business idea!).  If I can see the people are trying thats good enough for me for that particular meal.  If I don't like it, there are many other places to visit next time.  If I want something cooked perfectly the way I want it, I eat at home!

I'm also not too hard on waitstaff.  If they are making an effort and paying attention I tip 20%.  It's a crime what many of those people are getting paid per hour.  You can be sure that if it was me getting yelled at for something stupid that I'd tell the guy to get the **** out and don't come back.  I guess thats why I'm not a waiter...   It's amazing what those people deal with hour after hour for what they get paid.

I've walked out after waiting an extraordinary amount of time, and I've sent food back that was absolutely beyond any creative interpretation (such as the famous "cupped" steak), but those experiences are few and far between (maybe once every 50 outtings - especially when you avoid the chain restaurants like I do).  Usually it only takes one quiet comment to solve the problem, or looking at your watch when the waitstaff makes eye-contact.  Any restaurant that is serious about lasting doesn't all-out abandon the customer on every front.  But _every_ restaurant makes a butt-load of mistakes.

Just my $0.02.


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## Katie H (Oct 7, 2006)

One of the things that bugs me is when the server comes to take my order, when I'm with my husband, is that he/she addresses us as "you guys." My husband _is_ a guy and a quick glance at me and "the twins" will tell anyone that I'm definitely NOT a guy. This may sound insignificant, but it would be a nice change of pace if servers would practice some gentle manners in this area.


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## Alix (Oct 7, 2006)

> 3. Dirty bath/washrooms, or finding that there is no toilet paper after committing...   I don't mind a few crumpled paper-towels on the floor, but if I can't see myself in the mirror as I wash my hands I raise an eyebrow.


 
OK, that one got me. Holy yikes.


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## Nicholas Mosher (Oct 7, 2006)

HAHA!


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## buckytom (Oct 7, 2006)

that _is _gross!

one good thing about how bad men's bathrooms get is that i don't have to change diapers when we're out. i've shown dw that men are just happy to hit _something_ when they go, so she doesn't aske me to do the diaper changing/baby juggling routine anymore.

it's tough to keep his clothes, the diaper, and himself in the air all at the same time so nothing touches.


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## Nicholas Mosher (Oct 7, 2006)

Haha!

That reminds me of a story.  I was eating out once at this small non-climate controlled pizza joint.  It was about 100ºF, and with the giant pizza ovens it was probably 110ºF in the restaurant.  We decided to sit next to their rear-screen door which they had propped open, and commenced in devouring the pie (I go for for plain cheese/sauce on a thin New York style crust).  The cook came over - apologized for the heat - and set up a fan in the doorway.  About 10ft away from the door around back was the dumpster.  Nothing like ripe muggy trash breeze to finish off a gut-full of pie on a hot day...   

We all got up at once and sprinted for the trash can.  A couple people lost it.  We ended up laughing about it after.  He tried to give us the pizza for free, but we still paid/tipped.  

I'll tell you what, one thing there is no comparison for is a glass-bottled coca-cola pulled from a bucket of ice on a hot day.  I'm not big on processed foods - but I grew up with glass-bottled coke from a local package store that the owner kept in those plastic barrels filled with crushed ice.  Almost as good as an iced pilsner.


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## Andy M. (Oct 7, 2006)

I'm sorry, Katie, I refer to everyone as 'guys'.  I consider it a non-gender specific term.  My apologies to you and the twins.


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## Nicholas Mosher (Oct 7, 2006)

Ahahaha...


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## Nicholas Mosher (Oct 7, 2006)

Kinda like "Ellos" including both male and female gender specifics.


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## bullseye (Oct 7, 2006)

I can't stand seeing a daily special, then seeing the same thing on the regular menu at a lower price.  I've had disagreements with wait staff who did not want to let me order the lesser priced main menu item!

Perhaps we should start a thread about pet peeves from the other side.  We used to just love it when a good customer would come in, order the filet mignon special, but could I substitute salmon for the filet, and I don't eat potatoes, so how about rice, and I don't like green beans, do you have asparagus?

And, of course, half naked people from Massachusetts . . .


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## Claire (Oct 8, 2006)

Ouch.  I must go to a better class of restaurant.  Actually, we don't have a better class of restaurant.  It must be the midwest. I feel terrble that you have to put up with all of that when you eat out.  Overly attentive waiters?  What a cross to bear.  I don't order wine at a restaurant where they are unlikely to have many wine drinkers, I'll order a cocktail instead.  Know your restaurant and know your servers and know what is going on.  I've travelled a lot, and have actually had the serving staff ask ME to go behind the bar to search for a bottle of wine.  I've had the wait staff ask ME what to give to a Japanese group who asked for "wild Beam" or something like that.  I simply asked her if Wild Turkey or Jim Beam was more expensive.  She told me which one, and I said, feed them that.  I've also explained the difference between pinot noir and pinot grigio and ... well, the bottom line is that I find this fun, not something to complain about.  When people are being mean to you, well, that's something to complain about.  Ignorance can only be corrected with knowledge.  Yes, a $100/plate dinner should come with spectacular service.  If you're buying a plate of spaghetti for a few bucks, you need to be a little more tolerant.


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