# What peeves you?



## luvs (Jun 20, 2005)

what peeves me:
1.)fingernails on the chalkboard
2.)itching.
3.)computer problems.
4.)overly-self righteous people. i won't even get started on that one. let's just say that they annoy me to no end and i'd like to scream when i'm around one.
5.)can't say the last one. i'd get in big trouble for that.


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## texasgirl (Jun 20, 2005)

1. The bottom of my feet and the palms of my hands being touch {yes I know, weird, but the feeling makes my nerves stand on end, I've had this problem since being young, it is up there with scratching on jeans and other grooved surfaces} 

2. Smacking
3. Idiot drivers
4. Someone that is skinny talk about how fat they are


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## luvs (Jun 20, 2005)

texasgirl said:
			
		

> 4. Someone that is skinny talk about how fat they are


 
tee-hee, when i need to instill extreme guilt into my fiance, my favorite line is, 'oh, so apparantly you think i'm FAT!' even though, as you probably saw in my pictures, i'm quite skinny. it makes him more irate than anything else i say, even if i call him the worst of names.
you gotta keep those men on thier feet, i say!


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## texasgirl (Jun 20, 2005)

Too true, luvs!!


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## crewsk (Jun 20, 2005)

texasgirl said:
			
		

> 1. The bottom of my feet and the palms of my hands being touch {yes I know, weird, but the feeling makes my nerves stand on end, I've had this problem since being young, it is up there with scratching on jeans and other grooved surfaces}


 

I can't stand for my feet to be touched period!! It drives me insane. Especially if someone puts their fingers between my toes. I'm cringing just thinking about it!!


I don't really have too many peeves but the one thing that just makes me want to smack someone is when they talk about having no $ yet they go out to eat expensive dinners regularly & try to outdo thir neighbors by buying something their neighbor just bought only bigger & more expensive. That just iritates the heck out of me!!


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## jkath (Jun 20, 2005)

I don't like when people aren't honest.


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## Raine (Jun 20, 2005)

People who don't keep to the right, and go thru the door on the left side.

People who don't stop at STOP signs.

People when stopped at a traffic light, stop 1, 2, 3 or more car lengths behind the car in front of them.

People who park in clearly, no parking spots, or no parking spaces at all.

People who won't turn because they can't get all the way over to 3 or 4 lanes, where they want to be.

Store employees talking on the phone(personal calls) while assisting a cutomer.


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## pdswife (Jun 20, 2005)

let's see...

I can't handle being late or having someone arrive late or if I'm having guests ( think my mother) I can't handle if they show up earlier than agreed on.  
I get really upset if I make plans and the plans change (even if I'm the one the changes them)
and being lied to.  I  HATE being lied to.

I haven't had my coffee yet this morning so... I could go on and on and on.
but, I'll be nice and stop.


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## kadesma (Jun 20, 2005)

Let's see, 

1-potato chip and ice crunching in my ear 
2-gum snapping
drivers, who just have to cram in ahead of you to turn right, when they could do it one second later if they had stayed behind you!!!
3-parent, who wait til the last minute to drop off the kids at school, then stop dead in busy traffic and let those little guys out in the center of a busy street..
4-Anyone who asks me a question, I give the answer then they immediately try to change my mind
5-people who can't wait til you get out of an elevator before they almost knock you down trying to get on!
6-I'm one of those who when planning a party or dinner,always starts way ahead..and people who wait til the day before drive me to distraction..I could wring their necks 
other than that I'm EASY   
kadesma


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## BlueCat (Jun 20, 2005)

texasgirl said:
			
		

> 1. The bottom of my feet and the palms of my hands being touch {yes I know, weird, but the feeling makes my nerves stand on end, I've had this problem since being young, it is up there with scratching on jeans and other grooved surfaces}


 
Must be tricky to shake hands with people if you have that kind of quirk.  I'm surprised that two of you said that touching your feet bothers you so quickly.  I like having my feet touched.  Foot rubs are great.  One of my cats likes to rub against my feet and I love the feeling of the soft fur against my skin.  

I'm not quite sure about scratching on jeans either.  Is it like scratching on a blackboard to you?

Hearing someone slurp cereal makes me cringe for some reason.

Hearing someone say 'um' 50 times during a phone conversation makes me want to jump right through the phone line to strangle them.  Actually any repetetive word or phrase can get to me.  My brother likes to use the phrase "I'm just sayin'..." and I have to bite my tongue about that every time we talk.

I know there are others, but those are two of my biggies.

BC


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## kadesma (Jun 20, 2005)

BC,

don't you love it when you hear  Ya Know after every sentence? 

kadesma


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## luvs (Jun 20, 2005)

deleted this. i double posted.


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## texasgirl (Jun 20, 2005)

Blue cat, it's not the actual touching anything to my feet. What I can't take, is the texture, you know the rib like pattern on your feet and palms that make up your prints? I can touch my feet to anything that doesn't have that to go against mine. I can shake hands just fine, because, the hand is in one area and doesn't rub. Hard to explain. Dh tries all the time to catch me without my socks on at bedtime and rub the bottom of his foot with mine, you ever see a cat jump to the ceiling when you sneek up and touch it? That's me. I don't have a problem walking bare foot or anything, it's just that one texture. Do you know the kids books that used to be made that had the hard cover on the front that if you turned it one way, it showed one picture and you can turn it slightly the other way, the picture changes? I think there are still stickers like that too, scratch one of those with your fingernail,THAT is the feeling. And as for chalkboards, that doesn't bother me, but. listening to someone that it does bother, yes, it's that feeling. Blue jeans have that same texture and if my leg itches, I have to run to the bathroom, so that I don't scratch the blue jean material, other material doesn't bother me. LOL, I'm listening to myself writing this and I sound so psychotic!


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## kadesma (Jun 20, 2005)

luvs_food said:
			
		

> that annoys me so very much, too, kadesma, ya know?


 I know, it's really awful, ya know 
kadesma


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## Barbara L (Jun 20, 2005)

luvs_food said:
			
		

> that annoys me so very much, too, kadesma, ya know?


If you think that's bad, I knew someone who ended almost EVERY sentence with, "Ya know what I mean ya know?"

As soon as I have time, I'll post my peeves.  I'm up to 610 words on my paper that is due tonight (I need at least 1750).  It is turning out pretty good, but too slowly!  Back to work for me!

 Barbara


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## middie (Jun 20, 2005)

people who talk on the phone and don't pay attention to the road !!!!!!

people who are too busy gabbing on the phone instead of keeping an
eye on there kids !!!!

people on welfare who live in the projects driving brand spanking new 
cars while my bf and i bust our butts to drive around in cars 10 yrs old
or older !!!!!!

people commiting crimes and getting off scott free !!!!

i could go on and on but i won't.


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## kadesma (Jun 20, 2005)

middie said:
			
		

> people who talk on the phone and don't pay attention to the road !!!!!!
> 
> people who are too busy gabbing on the phone instead of keeping an
> eye on there kids !!!!
> ...


I would have liked to have listed those too Middie, but I figured, I'd be listed as a peeve as people wou list to many things But I agree with you 100%
kadesma


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## The Z (Jun 20, 2005)

Lack of courtesy (especially on the road).  When I use my turn signal it is to inform others what I intend to do...  It is not a request or a signal for them to close the space that happens to be in front of them.  It really frosts my coconuts when people are SO worried that someone else might get in front of them that 'merging courtesy' goes right out the window.
Having to sit through a traffic light twice because the person 'on the bubble' is distracted or not paying attention.  Sure, they eventually notice the light is green and get themSELVES through.
People who are not prepared when it is their turn to pay at the supermarket checkout... They wait until everything is rung up before they start writing their checks or start looking for coins and coupons.
   

(mmmmm frosted coconuts.....  )​


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## middie (Jun 20, 2005)

did i mention the people who wait to the last minute to get over when a sign says right laned closed... 3 MILES ago ?????


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## kadesma (Jun 20, 2005)

middie said:
			
		

> did i mention the people who wait to the last minute to get over when a sign says right laned closed... 3 MILES ago ?????


Middie, you mean the ones who nearly take off the front bumper of your car getting in front of you..I've watched them come tearing up that closed lane then push in front..Yep common courtesy YEESH!!!
kadesma


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## middie (Jun 20, 2005)

kadesma... THOSE ARE THE ONES !!!!!!!
have you been to cleveland ????? lol


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## kadesma (Jun 20, 2005)

middie said:
			
		

> kadesma... THOSE ARE THE ONES !!!!!!!
> have you been to cleveland ????? lol


NOPE   But I have little Cleveland right here in California 
I think some of the nuts emigrated  
kadesma


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## texasgirl (Jun 20, 2005)

The Z said:
			
		

> Lack of courtesy (especially on the road). When I use my turn signal it is to inform others what I intend to do... It is not a request or a signal for them to close the space that happens to be in front of them. It really frosts my coconuts when people are SO worried that someone else might get in front of them that 'merging courtesy' goes right out the window.
> Having to sit through a traffic light twice because the person 'on the bubble' is distracted or not paying attention. Sure, they eventually notice the light is green and get themSELVES through.
> People who are not prepared when it is their turn to pay at the supermarket checkout... They wait until everything is rung up before they start writing their checks or start looking for coins and coupons.
> 
> ...


Right on Z!!!!


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## BlueCat (Jun 20, 2005)

So Texasgirl, it's _*all*_ got to do with that ribbed texture, whether it be on your skin or on your blue jeans. I've never met anyone with that particular quirk. And no, it's not psychotic - it's original!   

BC


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## texasgirl (Jun 20, 2005)

Yes it's the ribbed thing that gets me.
Hey, I've never been called original. 
I've been called a lot of other things though


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## ironchef (Jun 21, 2005)

Geez, there's so many...but here's a few:

People that stand RIGHT IN FRONT of the elevator doors while waiting. Gee, don't ya think people might be coming out?
People the stand right in front of the elevator doors while riding, but don't bother to look around them whenever the elevator stops on a floor to see if anyone behind them needs to get out.
People that come to an elevator after you've already been waiting, see that the call button has been pressed, and still press it. Hey dummy, do you think I was just standing there for my health? Or maybe you think I like to stare perspectively at closed elevator doors.
People who misprounouce wine names. C'mon dude, if you can't say it, you don't know what the **** you're talking about. Period.
People who order their steak well done, then complain that it is dry. No **** it's going to be dry moron. Whenever you order a steak well done in ANY restaurant, we are going to cook the **** out it, because we don't want to hear your whiny *** sending it back, complaining that it's "not cooked through enough".
People who don't signal when making a turn. Hey, if I wanted to almost rear end you, then I would like to do so under my own power, not because your lazy *** failed to signal
People who switch lanes to get out from behind another car, then match speeds or go slower than that same car in the lane that they just came from. This is especially annoying when they cut into the fast lane and do this. It helps to have a raised truck because when you ride their bumper, all they see is a bumper and a grill in their rear window/mirror. It's even more effective at night because when you flash your high beams, their car gets illuminated like a supernova.
People who get in the express line (usually 10 or 8 or less items) with a whole freakin cart of stuff. Then, they get all pissy when the cashier tells them to go in another line. Idiot!
People who don't cover their mouth when they sneeze or cough. 
People who do a week's worth of banking on the ATM, especially when there's a line waiting. 
People who don't pick up after their pets in public/common areas. Hey, it's not the dog's fault. Shoot the person instead.


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## luvs (Jun 21, 2005)

i dunno, ironchef. i've been through 2 wine tasting courses, and i'm sure i still mispronounce wine names sometimes, but i do know what i'm talking about when i talk wine.


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## jkath (Jun 21, 2005)

- People who park in a handicapped space when they aren't handicapped.
- People who try to pawn off their children on anyone but themselves. These are usually the same parents who hate summer because it means they actually have to be around their own children.
- People who gossip.
- People who cheat.
- People who use a lot of foul language, especially when there are children around.
- People who always play "the victim".


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## buckytom (Jun 21, 2005)

ironchef said:
			
		

> Geez, there's so many...but here's a few:
> 
> People that stand RIGHT IN FRONT of the elevator doors while waiting. Gee, don't ya think people might be coming out?
> People the stand right in front of the elevator doors while riding, but don't bother to look around them whenever the elevator stops on a floor to see if anyone behind them needs to get out.
> ...


 
man, these make me crazy as well.... especially the elevator ones. works with subway doors too.


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## texasgirl (Jun 21, 2005)

Ironchef, whew  you are angry 

But those people ARE idiots


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## The Z (Jun 21, 2005)

In addition to those inconsiderate individuals on elevators... What about those people who get to the top of the escalator and then stop to have a look around before stepping off.


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## Maidrite (Jun 21, 2005)

Do you know what burns my Butt?






















A FLAME ABOUT THREE FEET HIGH ! 
People who don't understand I Love You All !


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## Andy M. (Jun 21, 2005)

ironchef said:
			
		

> ...People that come to an elevator after you've already been waiting, see that the call button has been pressed, and still press it...


 
Next time this happens to you, look at the person with an amazed expression on your face and exclaim sarcastically, "You have to press the button?!  Wow, I wish I'd known that 20 minutes ago!"


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## jkath (Jun 21, 2005)

Andy, I wish I could take you with me to Vegas for that exact reason!


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## Andy M. (Jun 21, 2005)

I'll start packing!  When do we leave?


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## jkath (Jun 21, 2005)

hee hee !!! I'll be out there in August, and (hopefully) meeting The Zhttp://www.discusscooking.com/forums/member.php?u=2562


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## luvs (Jun 21, 2005)

know what else peeves me? when a telemarketer calls and gets an attitude with me when i say i'm not interested and not to contact me again. it's like, look, little buddy, we'll solve this right now; can i please speak to your supervisor?


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## jkath (Jun 21, 2005)

Luvs - this works: Thank you so much, and I know you are working really hard, but right now I don't think I need your product, but I appreciate your time and I wish you the best of luck with your job. Have a nice evening.

I say it all the time.


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## middie (Jun 21, 2005)

Andy M. said:
			
		

> Next time this happens to you, look at the person with an amazed expression on your face and exclaim sarcastically, "You have to press the button?! Wow, I wish I'd known that 20 minutes ago!"


 
roflmao andy


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## ironchef (Jun 21, 2005)

texasgirl said:
			
		

> Ironchef, whew you are angry
> 
> But those people ARE idiots


 
It doesn't help that I also work with a lot of idiots. When I'm outside of work, I try to relax but...I can't. After a couple of beers I'm usually ok though.

Luvs, sometimes the French appellations are hard to pronounce, but I'm sure you never say "Merlot" with the "T" sound, or "Pinot" with the "T" sound either.


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## The Z (Jun 22, 2005)

middie said:
			
		

> did i mention the people who wait to the last minute to get over when a sign says right laned closed... 3 MILES ago ?????


 
Did *I* mention the people who, as soon as a *future* merge is indicated, immediately and dutifully get into the other lane and wait when there's still 3 miles of clear road before the lane actually closes out and then *refuse* to allow cars to merge from a perfectly legal open lane thinking they're "cutting in line" or something?  How Jr High!  LOL

Sorry, I guess I'm one of those.  I believe the signs are to let you know that the lane is closed in the future so you'll be ready for it when it happens.  I don't come tearing up the lane to 'cheat', but I think a lot of people merge way too early and then think they have the RIGHT to tailgate the car in front of them preventing a perfectly legal merge.


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## buckytom (Jun 22, 2005)

lol, try commuting in to nyc every morning. if you leave even 1/4 car length between you and the car in front of you, someone will see it as that you were letting them in. everyone waits until the last second to merge, or everyone behind them just goes around, and gets in front of both of you...


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## jkath (Jun 22, 2005)

....which is why I wish I lived in the midwest! 
All the Los Angeles County freeways are a nightmare!


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## buckytom (Jun 22, 2005)

jkath, i heard about a guy who went hunting in so. cal., and strapped the deer to the hood of his truck. he took the freeway home, and when he got there he found that the deer had been shot 4 more times...


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## jkath (Jun 22, 2005)

lol lol lol

I feel sorry for my h, who commutes 30 miles each way to work, yet it takes him 90 minutes each way.


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## The Z (Jun 22, 2005)

buckytom said:
			
		

> jkath, i heard about a guy who went hunting in so. cal., and strapped the deer to the hood of his truck. he took the freeway home, and when he got there he found that the deer had been shot 4 more times...


 
Good one...


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## wasabi (Jun 22, 2005)

*Bucky, I had a good laugh with that one.
	

	
	
		
		

		
			



*


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## roxygirl (Jun 23, 2005)

jkath said:
			
		

> ....which is why I wish I lived in the midwest!
> All the Los Angeles County freeways are a nightmare!


 
Oh yeah...


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## surfrkim (Jun 23, 2005)

I'm intolerant of intolerance - totally sick of people trying to jam my octagonal personality into the boring round "socially accepted" hole.  Happens to my son too.  If one more person uses some incongruous BS initials like ADD or some such crap to pigeon hole us I will send them into orbit (not that I am a violent person - just sick & tired if being persecuted for my individuality & labelled for society's convenience).  I look at the drones around me - give me my all-questioning, revolutionary anarchist ways any day of the week.  My son drives his teachers nuts - why?  Because he will not accept things at face value - he asks WHY??  EXPLAIN??  And says things like (forbid!!) I don't agree!!  He is also a natural musician playing tuba, trumpet, piano, drums & guitar (all at 11 years of age).  So, fine - if people want to follow the masses that's their busines - just don't categorise people like my son & I just because we are different from you & you don't understand us.

Whoo hoo!!  Never got such a major gripe off my chest on a forum before but... you DID ask what peeved people....

SK & surfrtom - Super Mum & son (well, one of 'em)


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## buckytom (Jun 23, 2005)

wow!!! way to go sufrkim, and sufrtom!!!!!!!!!!

thank god for people like you. it's so easy to fall into a rut, never questioning anything, never realizing that they have the power to control their own destiny (well, in a lot of countries anyway). so many people are asleep, or too depressed to notice, doing what they're expected to. all it takes is realizing that the past is the past, you can't change that now. so here you are, with what you've got, now go and do something with it. and make your own opinions on things, taking into account the opinions of people you trust and understand, but making of it your own. 
you can only give of yourself what you've made of yourself to give...


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## Maidrite (Jun 23, 2005)

1-Not ever having enough money in my billfold to pay all the bills!
2-When they changed the check thing from 2 days to 2 hours, Have you concidered how much they ( THE BANKS) make off that alone in fees overdraft and find out. $37.50 for as little as .01 overdrafted plus $5 a day till you catch up. 
3-The Price of Bottled water.
4-The Price of Bottled Air.
5-The Gum someone throw on the sidewalk instead of the trash can that I now have to scrap of my shoe.


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## The Z (Jun 23, 2005)

surfrkim - -

Welcome to the forum. I know you're not interested in another "label", but my life changed when I realized that I am on the Autism spectrum. Specifically, I have a sub-clinical form of Asperger's Syndrome. As I learned more and more about the differences between me and the 'typical' world around me, I became better able to function within their world.

I don't know if this possibility was ever considered with your son, but there is getting to be more and more information on it. Anyway - - Here's an interesting article - - and you can find lots more information on Tony Attwood's web site.

(and, oh - - that's the explanation for my signature below)


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## surfrkim (Jun 23, 2005)

Cheers buckytom & I love your signature Z (made me think of ME instantly the first time I read one of your posts.)  You see, my life changed also when some do-gooder teacher of Tom's pointed out he might be ADHD.  What the **** was that - weren't they slow-learners or something I thought.  Tom was vivacious & intelligent, a good reader etc so I dismissed it.  She raised the subject with me again (he was in kindergarten by the way) so I looked it up on the web.  It was then suggested I was ADHD also.  I did the test for both of us & yes we fell into their categorisation easily. One thing led to another and before I knew it my son was on Ritalin (because I was convinced by his doctor that was the best thing for him).  My husband was furious - he loves Tom's quirky personality - he fell in love with me because of mine.  Before this rotten sod of a teacher stuck her big nose into our affairs I was just Kim - that outrageous girl (I loved it) - now I had a label & so did my son.  He only took meds for 6 months before we revolted, banned the use of the term ADHD.  Actually, we don't think it actually even exists - it is a banner to hang on children who are different - drugging them makes life easier for mum, dad & (especially) their teachers.  There is nothing in our personality that leaves us unable to function.  Sure, we are very outspoken & say a lot of things other people may not want to hear (even though it is usually at their instigation - I remember being with a workmate once when she was trying on a dress & asked a group of us girls what we thought - the others were polite & said "oh, it's.. nice".  It was hiddeous & I told her so.  I don't know who you would rather go shopping with but I'd rather be with someone who gives me an honest, albeit blunt, answer).

I just have one question - why do YOU need to function better in THEIR world?  It's OUR world isn't it? Why can't they broaden THEIR minds to more extreme personalities? I read the article on Aspergers you recommended &, like the ADHD thing (which is also supposed to be in the autism spectrum) we could easily be defined by it.  However, there was one quote it gave from an online support group that I really liked - "Is ANYONE really `normal?' "  

Nature abhors normality!!! - Hey, I think I'll set that as my signature   

Listen Z - you sound cool to me.  Be yourself and don't let any of the mundane drones of the world try and make you in their image - you may not like what you end up seeing.

Cheers SK


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## ps8 (Jun 23, 2005)

Oh, boy!  I get to be negative!!

1. People that say the "t" in often.
2. Litter bugs
3. Gum smacking - especially when it's in church & doubly especially when it's by an adult
4. People who state their _opinions_ as facts (unless it's me, of course, because my opinions should be considered facts... )
5. People who get mad at me, but don't tell me.  Instead they go to my hubby and complain about me to him.
6. People who are being _helpful_ by telling me the treatment we're using for our child isn't the right treatment, isn't the current treamtnet, etc.
7. People who drive on the shoulder in a traffic jam.
8. People who are so open-minded that they actually end up being close minded.


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## middie (Jun 23, 2005)

6. People who are being _helpful_ by telling me the treatment we're using for our child isn't the right treatment, isn't the current treamtnet, etc.


ps8 know what i say to that? you're the  parent and you know what's better for your child and if they don't like it tell them they can walk the other way.


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## tweedee (Jun 23, 2005)

I love nothing better then to have my feet rubbed.


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## ps8 (Jun 23, 2005)

middie said:
			
		

> you're the parent and you know what's better for your child and if they don't like it tell them they can walk the other way.


 
You're right, of course, but I have a hard time doing that.  That's not to say that we change what we're doing because of what they say, though.  We're pretty confident in our decisions.


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## luvs (Jun 23, 2005)

so many valid complaints!


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## The Z (Jun 24, 2005)

surfrkim said:
			
		

> I just have one question - why do YOU need to function better in THEIR world? It's OUR world isn't it? Why can't they broaden THEIR minds to more extreme personalities? I read the article on Aspergers you recommended &, like the ADHD thing (which is also supposed to be in the autism spectrum) we could easily be defined by it. However, there was one quote it gave from an online support group that I really liked - "Is ANYONE really `normal?' "
> 
> Listen Z - you sound cool to me. Be yourself and don't let any of the mundane drones of the world try and make you in their image - you may not like what you end up seeing.


 
You're right, Kim - - I AM cool  

It would be so nice if we could get the world to change in a way that is more accepting of individuals with 'differences'. I'm sorry, but that ain't gonna happen. There are just too MANY of them!!! AAARRRRGGGHHHH !!!

I didn't mean that I had changed _to become more like THEM_. What changed for me was my understanding of their way of thinking. Instead of thinking that everybody else had it WRONG, I began to see them (neuro-typicals) as another species - - a species who thought about things differently and processed things differently. I was socially blunt, logical, to-the-point and didn't understand their social nuance, body language and expectations of certain reciprocities. Even within a business situation, the _dance _is important.

The world is dominated by neuro-typicals (NT's) and they make the rules. I have had considerable problems in the past with employers and in relationships because I didn't understand their rules. It was frustrating. My (then unknown) difference didn't stop me from functioning in their world, but it DID prevent me from functioning well. I felt like Spock (Star Trek) who didn't understand the emotion and nuance of social interaction around him, but was still fascinated by the way people acted.

I am quite certain that I will never completely 'get it' and I have NO interest or plan to change who I am or the way I think - - but understanding THEM a little better helps me be a little less frustrated and a little more understanding. Here's another article you might find interesting. It contains links to the on-line tests that became the springboard for my initial interest and research.

All the best and, again, welcome to the forum.


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## pdswife (Jun 24, 2005)

Z,  
I think the world would be very very boring
if we were all "normal".  

Keep on being YOU.  The people I love
most in this world are the ones that are
just a little different.  : )


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## buckytom (Jun 24, 2005)

Z, you are unique, just like everyone else...


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## SizzlininIN (Jun 24, 2005)

well one that i had to deal with today was someone popping their gum.....not the big bubble pop but that annoying little snap...snap....snap.....snap.  I wanted to go snap her on the back and make her choke on it..... just kidding about the choking.....maybe i'd get lucky and it would go down without any hitch. 

-someone driving slow in the passing lane or going the same speed as the people in the slow lane.....hubby has a bad habit of that

-someone reading over my shoulder

thats just a few!


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## The Z (Jun 25, 2005)

buckytom said:
			
		

> Z, you are unique, just like everyone else...


 
Of course everyone is unique.  However, some are more unique than others.


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## roxygirl (Jun 25, 2005)

buckytom said:
			
		

> Z, you are unique, just like everyone else...


 
  I used to love telling that to my friends who would suddenly have these revelations that they're so different from everyone else!


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## Maidrite (Jun 25, 2005)

Even me Buckytom, I am too?  

There a guy named Sully looking for you , He said he needs you to get out your Flobee again! He said he will be at the Barber Shop Tonight!


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## Zereh (Jun 26, 2005)

Couple things ~ my biggest pet peeve ever is towards myself that I let little things get under my skin. I'm learning to let it all slide. Slowly. =0) I'm trying to save my energy for better things! (Repeats to self again and again... haha)

Other thing I think is funny is how we spend the first portion of our lives trying so hard to be like everyone else and then we spend the rest of it trying so hard to be unique. It's a strange world we live in.

I am very strongly opposed to feeding our children serious psychotic drugs in hopes that they'll learn to suck up the extreme boredom dished out by our school systems. And feeding them drugs so that they're easier to control. No one knows what the long term effects of those drugs are. But I'm pretty sure it's safe to assume that it won't be pretty. Screwing about with the chemical structure of our brains isn't something to be taken lightly.

Don't force your child to fit into a mold, create a mold where you child fits.

Kudos to you who refuse to be a lemming! and thank the gods that you're there to be a champion for your child. It breaks my heart to think of those who don't have someone like you there to stand up for them.


Z


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## licia (Jun 26, 2005)

I was surprised by all the things that peeves us . I have quite a list, but one that really bothers me is to have someone tell what should be a very short item - only to take so many departures you can't get away from them. I find myself avoiding them or not slowing down to talk at all. Also, those who always know the answer (whether they use it in their own lives or not). We certainly have our share of bad drivers also. The military and good weather brings people from all over and some of them got their drivers' license at the thrift store, and we have our own rednecks who shouldn't be on the roads at all. I hope this doesn't sound like I'm mad.


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## corazon (Jun 26, 2005)

-People who scuff their feet when they walk. like they are too lazy to pick up their feet.
-I'm with you all on the gum snapping and loud eating, not closing their mouths when eating.
-Complaints about drivers are really popular, it's funny, if everyone in the world complained about bad drivers there would still be horrible drivers out there.  My dad sure does complain about awful drivers and I have to say, he's probably the worst one on the roads.
-I hate when people constantly yell at their kids.  As if their kids will only hear them if they are screaming at the top of their lungs, but the kids just learn to block it out, so the parents yell louder and louder.  No patience with their children.
-The way Michael Jackson looks!  That guys doesn't even look human anymore!

Goodness, once you get started, it's hard to stop.  We all have those little things.
-Brooke


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## corazon (Jun 26, 2005)

Just another quick note about bad drivers.  My husband always notices when the bathroom is dirty but never when it is clean.  We always notice and point them out when we see a "bad driver" but never when we see a good one.  

Another thing that drives me nuts...
Impatience!
-Brooke


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## The Z (Jun 27, 2005)

*People who minimize 'differences' by saying that everyone is different (as if that's supposed to solve something).*

Well, "Duh", right?  Big revelation - - and just so very clever and insightful!  As children we're all TOLD that everybody is unique, but we're not always told what to do about those differences.

'COMMON KNOWLEDGE' does not stop people from treating people who think differently as 'wrong' or somehow 'less' than THEY are.

You know - - people get teased or treated differently and then everybody is SHOCKED when a school shooting or some other tragedy happens.  Why?  Because people (as a whole) so NOT accept or understand the implications of the well-loved axiom that "everybody's different".  That rule does not help people accept differences for what they are.  Instead, it helps they, themselves, cope with all those people in the world that are not quite as _right_ as they are.


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## buckytom (Jun 27, 2005)

which is why it is important to allow people to disagree, to dissent, not to quash every notion of things unpleasant.

is anyone in there listening??? 

thomas jefferson said "the greatest form of patriotism is dissent".


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## kadesma (Jun 27, 2005)

Amen Bucky 

kadesma


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## mudbug (Jun 27, 2005)

One of my closest friends and I are miles apart politically and yet we remain friends.  Why?  Because we have agreed to disagree and accept that as part of the dynamic of our friendship.

Life would be boring if we all drove 57 Chevys.


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## ronjohn55 (Jun 27, 2005)

What peeves me? The amount of money it's going to cost to replace the propeller that got destroyed this weekend......   

John


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## surfrkim (Jun 27, 2005)

buckytom said:
			
		

> which is why it is important to allow people to disagree, to dissent, not to quash every notion of things unpleasant.
> 
> is anyone in there listening???
> 
> thomas jefferson said "the greatest form of patriotism is dissent".


 
Hey Bucky - I'm listening & I hear you loud & clear (& TJ has just won another fan - great quote & so so TRUE).

I am the original dissenter - the "Queen of Confrontation" because I cannot condone complacency & loathe apathy. Miss Popularity I will never be but bollocks to that - I am true to myself. I have never understood how having an opinion that is in opposition to others is considered being confrontational in the first place - just because I don't agree with you, won't accept crap &/or speak up about the things I believe in? Well, excuse me for breathing!! I don't remember sending my opponents to the chair for disagreeing with me - but, just because they feel they represent the majority of opinion (rightly or wrongly) they seem indignant of my voicing my point of view. Here is a ridiculous example of what I mean: I ask you, why do so many people get so upset at my suggestion that, for example, Celine Dion sucks and has no talent. So what? I remember during the punk revolution of the late 70's / early 80's everyone around me was telling me my preferred music was utter crap - it didn't bother me in the least because I was secure in what I liked. What is their problem? If they think Dion rocks isn't that all that matters? Why should they give a tinker's cuss what I think about her - I don't care what they think of MY musical preferences!! An unimportant example, I know, but it illustrates my point. If people are perturbed about something so insignifiicant can you imagine how they must boil about people dissenting the more important issues??

And I must disagree with Z (though ya know I luvs ya 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





) - the school shootings in the States has less to do with lack of acceptance of difference as it does with oversized, impersonal schooling institutions, remote parents and - most importantly - gun ownership. Remove the weapon of convenience and you remove the means - takes a helluva lot more emotional input to ram a knife into someone's belly than to stand remotely at a distance & squeeze a trigger. Every household there seems to be in possession of a firearm. I have lived in Australia all my life - all 45 years - & (accept for a few military & police acquaintences) have NEVER met ANYONE living in a city or town that owns a gun. I have never personally ever SEEN a real gun in Australia (accept perhaps glimpsing the handle of a policeman's gun in its holster), let alone touched one. I did however see a handgun in the US - it was pulled on us by an extremely nervous police officer in the middle of the night because we were parked (sleeping in our rented RV) on the shoulder of a remote road. There was a knock on the door at about midnight - I opened it to find no-one there until this lunatic swung from against the side of the van & pointed the bloody thing in my face!!!!! Talk about watching too many Hollywood movies!!!! 

PS - Why can't I write h.e.l.l. - the last time I posted I used this extremely harmless word & it was blanked out & replaced by **** which made it look like I used a very crude word as I said "what the h.e.l.l. does that mean" - you can see why I was not very pleased when I read my posting - made me look like a total potty mouth!!!


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## The Z (Jun 27, 2005)

surfrkim - - I enjoy reading your thoughtful insights. You're right. I didn't mean to assert/imply that there was a singular reason for violent tragedies in our society. To do so would, of course, be simplistic.

I agree with you about the importance of our gun ownership (easy access) problems. So far this year there have been 11 freeway shootings in L.A. area (there were a total of 36 in 2004 and 46 in 2003, so I guess we should feel good about the decline, huh?  ) 

I lived in Australia for 11 years (Newcastle area) and think that, while the Aussie gov't has it's share of problems, the U.S. could learn a GREAT deal from the way things are done there - - especially in terms of health care, social programs, school systems and labour laws (loved that leave loading - - still have that?).


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## Maidrite (Jun 27, 2005)

buckytom said:
			
		

> lol, try commuting in to nyc every morning. if you leave even 1/4 car length between you and the car in front of you, someone will see it as that you were letting them in. everyone waits until the last second to merge, or everyone behind them just goes around, and gets in front of both of you...



Buckytom you really must try driving here in South Carolina, They don't take road conditions ever into account. We live by 601 a highway that ranks in the top 10 in the country for deaths. It is enter at your own risk !
I was going to work one moring at 4:30 am and had 4 cars pass me in FOG you couldn't see much beyond 30 feet going up hill (THEY COULDN"T SEE WHAT WAS COMING) and They all 4 passed me at the same time. I was doing 60 myself ! This is a narrow 2 lane highway and is only 17 miles long. They are going to turn in into a 4 lane in the next ten years.  20 people have been killed on it in the pass 3 years!   
How is your live going ?


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## ps8 (Jun 27, 2005)

Zereh said:
			
		

> Couple things ~ my biggest pet peeve ever is towards myself that I let little things get under my skin. I'm learning to let it all slide. Slowly. =0) I'm trying to save my energy for better things! (Repeats to self again and again... haha)
> 
> 
> Kudos to you who refuse to be a lemming! and thank the gods that you're there to be a champion for your child. It breaks my heart to think of those who don't have someone like you there to stand up for them.


 
I tell myself those same things - about not letting little things bother me.  I know they shouldn't bug me, but somehow they do - and that really bugs me!

I have to comment on the last part.  I don't in any way consider myself a lemming.  Nor do I try to make my child fit into a mold. I do, however, have him take meds.  We went through several years of finding one that works without taking away his wonderfully quirky personality.  But, he needs the help that the meds offer.  He can concentrate better.  He can think before acting/speaking (at least sometimes).  He's not in trouble all day because of his behavior.  We have made it very clear to him that the meds are only an assist - not a solution.  That ultimately, he is responsible for his own behavior.  But for him to have a feeling of success, he needs some help.

I'm probably not stating my case very well.  I also think that we drug our kids way to readily.  The first doctor we took ds to sounded like a great doctor.  We would have to come in weekly, at first, until we had things better under control.  We went through about three different meds before we found one that seemed to be working.  Then, when we would come in for our weekly follow-up, I would fill out this questionaire about ds' behavior during the past week (like, on a scale of 1-5, how did he do with staying in a chair, speaking out of turn, etc.  I don't remember exactly, but I think 1 was good and 5 was bad).  We could definitly see improvement, but he still wasn't "perfect", and I marked the sheet as honestly as I could.  The doctor would then up his dose.  It was up'd to the point where I had a walking drone instead of a son.  His wonderful sense of humor was gone.  He never smiled anymore, let alone laughed.  We did that for (I'm ashamed to say) about a month when I realized that this is NOT what was needed.  So, I took him back down to one pill a day (he'd started at one 18 mg pill and moved up to 4 a day!  He was only about 7 at the time) and we quit going to that doctor.  It's been a long road, but we're happy with where we are right now.  He's still my wonderfully quirky boy (at the age of 8, he thought that the name "Norm" was short for Enormous!  Isn't that great!!), still has a little trouble with impulse control, but as far as I'm concerned, it's all tolerable because I don't know any teenager out there who has a perfect personality.  And besides, I know his heart - and there's not a better heart out there.

I guess what I'm trying to say and not succeding is simply this:  just because my son takes meds for ADHD doesn't mean that I don't have his BEST interests at heart.  It doesn't mean that I'm giving him meds to make MY life easier.  I believe that some people need help and he is one of them.  I try to keep all my children's best interests in mind when deciding treatments, disciplines, schooling, vacations, church, fun and games, movies, etc. 

So, that's the other side of the coin, I guess.  Sorry to be so long winded.  And I hope I'm not coming across as being rude or anything, because I'm not meaning it that way.


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## kadesma (Jun 27, 2005)

I haven't entered in to this discussion, but have been reading...Seems to me that you are mom's of beautiful lovely children..One chooses not to give meds, the other does give the meds. Who's right and who's wrong? Neither...You both love your children and seek to do what you feel is best for them.  For that you both deserve a big well done!  Keep being their mom's and doing what you are doing.. Only YOU have the right..All we can do is support you.
kadesma
having four grown children and 5-1/2 grandchildren, who are what make my heart beat and my breath catch, you will be in my thought.


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## Maidrite (Jun 27, 2005)

Has anyone mention not enough money to pay the bills along with raising costs of everything because of oil prices ?
Greed, Greed, and More Greed.


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## ps8 (Jun 27, 2005)

kadesma said:
			
		

> I haven't entered in to this discussion, but have been reading...Seems to me that you are mom's of beautiful lovely children..One chooses not to give meds, the other does give the meds. Who's right and who's wrong? Neither...You both love your children and seek to do what you feel is best for them. For that you both deserve a big well done! Keep being their mom's and doing what you are doing.. Only YOU have the right..All we can do is support you.
> kadesma
> having four grown children and 5-1/2 grandchildren, who are what make my heart beat and my breath catch, you will be in my thought.


 
You said it much more eloquently than I could have.  Thanks for the support!  And, the funny thing is, I support those that don't do meds, too.  As long as the motives are for the best of the child...that's the important issue, right?  I hope I get to be a grandmother someday - but not soon!!


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## surfrkim (Jun 27, 2005)

The Z said:
			
		

> I lived in Australia for 11 years (Newcastle area) and think that, while the Aussie gov't has it's share of problems, the U.S. could learn a GREAT deal from the way things are done there - - especially in terms of health care, social programs, school systems and labour laws (loved that leave loading - - still have that?).


 
Brace yourself Z but our "wonderful" govt. obtains control of the Senate on 1 July. This is a government that has gone out of its way to dessimate the public school system (you should see the funding private schools get - they are trying to force people into this user pays system. I refuse - the right to an education should exist for everyone!! I'd remove my children from school & self-educate them if it came to the crunch). Our public health system (I believe to be one of the finest in the world) & social welfare (one more spurious claim about women having babies to rip the govt off & I'll punch a hole in the wall - do they have any idea how much the little ankle biters COST you - it's a bloody sight more than the pittance that is given out) - both are up against the wall. Our labour laws are the next major victim with the Industrial Relations Commission being made impotent and the job of bargaining left to little individuals & mass corporations. The divide between the haves & have-nots is widening into a gaping chasm!! If Howard has his way our family (& many more like us) will be living beneath the poverty line in the not too distant future while all the while being surrounded by the greed and over-indulgences of others. They called the 80's the ME generation - the decade of greed. How on earth then would they even start to define this decade??? 
Bring forth the revolution!!!!


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## kadesma (Jun 27, 2005)

ps8 said:
			
		

> You said it much more eloquently than I could have. Thanks for the support! And, the funny thing is, I support those that don't do meds, too. As long as the motives are for the best of the child...that's the important issue, right? I hope I get to be a grandmother someday - but not soon!!


Thank you ps8, 
Yes, that little child is the only thing that matters. I know, it's hard to raise a child,it's trying when they misbehave, or are ill, or have something happen to them, but, there is that wonderful feeling you get when you look at your child all curled up asleep, the pride you feel with each thing they master..Tehy are our lives. I hope one day you have those grandkids and yes not to soon Enjoy your child and then your grandchild..It's a heady, filling feeling.
kadesma


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## mish (Jun 27, 2005)

Haven't read thru the posts yet, but here's one of mine.

Never talking to a real person, when calling a big company. Then having to press #1, #2, etc., etc. & finally getting a recording:

"Due to the high volume of calls at this time, please try back again later."

Grrrrrrrrr.


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## pdswife (Jun 27, 2005)

That really bugs me too Mish!  And being on hold and hearing ever 15 second how important my call is... year right... I believe them.  lol


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## luvs (Jun 27, 2005)

my BIGGEST peeve has got to be my health insurance company. i'm sure i'm not the only one.
i spend more time appealing and fighting and trying to get coverage for medications than you can shake a stick at. month after month, letters arrive: this benefit has been cut, that benefit has been cut, pre-authorization for this is now necessary, a larger co-pay for that is now necessary....


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## middie (Jun 27, 2005)

now it's work... and we'll leave it at that


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## mish (Jun 28, 2005)

pdswife said:
			
		

> That really bugs me too Mish! And being on hold and hearing ever 15 second how important my call is... year right... I believe them. lol


 
&, &, &, being on hold 15 minutes & the dumb bunnies disconnect (switch hook) you. Then comes the recording:

"If you'd like to mAke a call, please hang up & dial again."


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