Yeah he knows better, that's going way too far!
Petty Vents II
- Thread starter dragnlaw
- Start date
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If you have answers, please help by responding to the unanswered posts.
GinnyPNW
Master Chef
@Jusa I feel for you! Let's face it, sometimes people...especially guys...don't seem to see things from our perspective. Many years ago, I set up a calendar that "we" can both use to keep track of important things. Gradually, DH learned to look there first to make sure there are not any conflicts. Especially like making doctor appointments when we are IN town...LOL. And, we visit MIL at least every other week...and I update the calendar that we gift to her. So she isn't surprised when we are 100 miles away, instead of 10. I know your situation is different from mine. Maybe it would help reduce conflicts for you...maybe not. Just thought I would share what works in our house.
Thanks!
He absolutely knew about both my work project and the wedding because we had talked about both those things about an hour before he made those plans. He also knew we weren't doing anything Sunday and Monday. What he didn't take into consideration is when we go to family events (all his side of the family, I have no relatives living within 500 miles of me), I'm nearly always the DD. I had just mentioned to him that afternoon that we are taking an uber to and from the wedding (his cousin's wedding) so I can have more than 1 glass of wine or cocktail. Which shouldn't take a detailed explanation that I want to party a little and sleep in Sunday. And both MIL and stepdaughter knew about the wedding Saturday because they both declined attending. If I gave MIL a calendar she probably would tell me she talks to her son every day (which is true) and already knows our schedules, lol. Maybe if she starts to get forgetful I'll do that though, good idea for the future. Thanks again!
GinnyPNW
Master Chef
Here, we make plans 9 to 12 months in advance. 9 months for State Park camping reservations and 12 months for doctors' appointments...LOL. I need the reminder as much as DH!
Tell me, why not just send a text to MIL, SD and DH, "Can we change the dinner from Sunday to Monday? That would work much better for me."
Tell me, why not just send a text to MIL, SD and DH, "Can we change the dinner from Sunday to Monday? That would work much better for me."
We pretty much do our doctor's appointments on our own and it's never later than 2-3 pm and of course not on the weekends so no issues with dinner plans there.
I don't want to start a fight with my husband by doing that. I don't have the time or energy for it.
OP
OP
I think I understand their thinking. DH or MIL says "Oh, we/you aren't doing anything Sat. or Sun. Shall we say 5 or 5:30?"
I have an SIL like that. She can come home from a 2 week absence and the next day have an open house. Or I'll come home from a stressful trip and she'll say "Oh good, you're home by 3pm, we'll be there around 5:30 so we'll have lots of time to eat before cards!"
I have an SIL like that. She can come home from a 2 week absence and the next day have an open house. Or I'll come home from a stressful trip and she'll say "Oh good, you're home by 3pm, we'll be there around 5:30 so we'll have lots of time to eat before cards!"
Marlingardener
Sous Chef
People who invite themselves to your home are a PITA! Gently make it clear to your husband that you are to be consulted before any visiting/dining plans are made. Stand firm, but nicely.
My husband has a niece that invited herself and spouse to visit on Dec. 23rd and 24th. In addition to prepping for Christmas dinner I provided two lunches, one dinner, and one breakfast. They stayed overnight and she got a little drunk.
I told my husband I didn't like his niece, nor her husband, and if he wanted them to visit, I'd just spend the time in a hotel.
They haven't been back since.
My husband has a niece that invited herself and spouse to visit on Dec. 23rd and 24th. In addition to prepping for Christmas dinner I provided two lunches, one dinner, and one breakfast. They stayed overnight and she got a little drunk.
I told my husband I didn't like his niece, nor her husband, and if he wanted them to visit, I'd just spend the time in a hotel.
They haven't been back since.
pepperhead212
Executive Chef
Good reasons to have those peppers I have...
Kathleen
Cupcake
Speaking of peppers, I had to go to FIVE stores to find jalapeños and white onions today. The driver of this trip (not me) was not amused.
GinnyPNW
Master Chef
Jalapenos are pretty easy to grow!
Kathleen
Cupcake
I've got several really pretty plants that are taking their own sweet time giving me peppers.
GinnyPNW
Master Chef
What cha feeding them? Not that I'm any expert!
Andy M.
Certified Pretend Chef
SO grew a jalapeño plant but the crappy weather resulted in stunted fruits.
Are they not fruiting or slow growing?
I ran in the other direction with this situation and made lemonade out of it instead of being a sourpuss. I just said screw it and for tomorrow's dinner I invited my husband's nephew and his wife and their two kids, plus my oldest stepdaughter and her husband and their two kids (each of those families live about an hour away and we don't see them much). It's going to be loud and exhausting tomorrow and the house is going to get trashed, lol. Not even gonna tell MIL some of her other grandchildren and great-grandchildren are coming, just gonna sit back and watch the tears of joy fall.
Kathleen
Cupcake
Slow growing and slow fruiting. I've put some veggie spikes in. They have enough sun and water. It has not been a great year for my nightshades.
I was asking because once when we were growing eggplants they would bloom, but nothing would come out of it even though the plants were mature and in good health. I finally got a small clean paintbrush and went around hand pollinating. We had eggplants out our ears after that.
Kathleen
Cupcake
It might be too late for this year, but I will remember for next year!
Hubby had way too much to drink at the wedding last night. I had enough to be over the legal limit (since I wasn't driving that wasn't an issue) but still able to wake up feeling okay. I woke up around 7:30 a.m. this morning to go take the ribs out to thaw and he said, "Maybe we should cancel tonight." I said, "NOPE." He said, "Well don't count on me being of much help today, I think the food was bad and I feel like crap." 
Maybe it was the multiple double Crown Royals with a splash of gingerale that he drank last night and he didn't eat enough food before he started drinking? We left here at 2:30 pm yesterday and he had a drink before we even got picked up...
So he stayed in bed and I got up and made pasta salad and potato salad and swept the floors. Still gotta clean the guest bathroom and run the Swiffer Wet Jet through the kitchen and dining room, then get the ribs in by around 3. I am going to have him sweep the decks and I can clean the glass on the sliding doors. He just got up and is drinking coffee. Guests don't arrive until 5:30 so we are way ahead of schedule.
Maybe it was the multiple double Crown Royals with a splash of gingerale that he drank last night and he didn't eat enough food before he started drinking? We left here at 2:30 pm yesterday and he had a drink before we even got picked up...
So he stayed in bed and I got up and made pasta salad and potato salad and swept the floors. Still gotta clean the guest bathroom and run the Swiffer Wet Jet through the kitchen and dining room, then get the ribs in by around 3. I am going to have him sweep the decks and I can clean the glass on the sliding doors. He just got up and is drinking coffee. Guests don't arrive until 5:30 so we are way ahead of schedule.
OP
OP
Way to go girl! You are amazing!
Maybe drop a pan (or even two), empty of course. Might wake him up a bit ( I am so nasty, vengeful). He'll probably be in full swing by tonight again.
Maybe drop a pan (or even two), empty of course. Might wake him up a bit ( I am so nasty, vengeful). He'll probably be in full swing by tonight again.
