Adventures With Mom
- Thread starter Kaneohegirlinaz
- Start date
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OP
OP
Kaneohegirlinaz
Wannabe TV Chef
I realized just the other day that my Mother has been living independently in her own apartment in the Senior Living Community, about a half hour drive away from us, for two years now.
I convinced her a few months back that we should have her hair "done" by a professional about every 10 days or so. I could tell that she was having a difficult time with styling her hair in to any sort of semblance aka she looked like
I gotta tell y'all, her attitude has improved tremendously!
At first, DH thought that it wouldn't be such a great idea, because I'd have to drive her to and from the hair dresser's place.
So I asked Mom if she wanted to try the Beauty Parlor in the "Community" ...
"NO! Their terrible! Have you looked at some of the women here? They look awful!"
Not to mention, the nice young gal that does my hair as well as all of my Neighborhood Gal Pal's, is so great with her AND it cost 1/3rd the price as the "Community".
It's a win-win, Mom takes me out to lunch when she's finished. I take her where ever she wants, her choice, well, after all, she's buying
It's like a light went off inside of Mom.
She's doing more things, socializing within her complex, participating in the different activities and eating in the dining room, FINALLY! Meals are extremely inexpensive for the residents and she seems to think that she can't afford to do that... WHAT?!
"MOM! you can eat in the dining room whenever you like, you can afford it! It's less than what some of these frozen meals cost, really!"
I got her monthly statement for her "room & board" yesterday, I figure last month she ate "out" as she's calling it, twice a week on average, that's pretty good. AND she's got new dining buddies too!
Their dining rooms are BYOB, so I bought her those little "one glass" bottles of her favorite wine to take and share.
(photo curtesy of instacart)
Now, can we talk about your clothes Mother?
I convinced her a few months back that we should have her hair "done" by a professional about every 10 days or so. I could tell that she was having a difficult time with styling her hair in to any sort of semblance aka she looked like
I gotta tell y'all, her attitude has improved tremendously!
At first, DH thought that it wouldn't be such a great idea, because I'd have to drive her to and from the hair dresser's place.
So I asked Mom if she wanted to try the Beauty Parlor in the "Community" ...
"NO! Their terrible! Have you looked at some of the women here? They look awful!"
Not to mention, the nice young gal that does my hair as well as all of my Neighborhood Gal Pal's, is so great with her AND it cost 1/3rd the price as the "Community".
It's a win-win, Mom takes me out to lunch when she's finished. I take her where ever she wants, her choice, well, after all, she's buying
It's like a light went off inside of Mom.
She's doing more things, socializing within her complex, participating in the different activities and eating in the dining room, FINALLY! Meals are extremely inexpensive for the residents and she seems to think that she can't afford to do that... WHAT?!
"MOM! you can eat in the dining room whenever you like, you can afford it! It's less than what some of these frozen meals cost, really!"
I got her monthly statement for her "room & board" yesterday, I figure last month she ate "out" as she's calling it, twice a week on average, that's pretty good. AND she's got new dining buddies too!
Their dining rooms are BYOB, so I bought her those little "one glass" bottles of her favorite wine to take and share.
(photo curtesy of instacart)
Now, can we talk about your clothes Mother?
I realized just the other day that my Mother has been living independently in her own apartment in the Senior Living Community, about a half hour drive away from us, for two years now.
I convinced her a few months back that we should have her hair "done" by a professional about every 10 days or so. I could tell that she was having a difficult time with styling her hair in to any sort of semblance aka she looked like
I gotta tell y'all, her attitude has improved tremendously!
At first, DH thought that it wouldn't be such a great idea, because I'd have to drive her to and from the hair dresser's place.
So I asked Mom if she wanted to try the Beauty Parlor in the "Community" ...
"NO! Their terrible! Have you looked at some of the women here? They look awful!"
Not to mention, the nice young gal that does my hair as well as all of my Neighborhood Gal Pal's, is so great with her AND it cost 1/3rd the price as the "Community".
It's a win-win, Mom takes me out to lunch when she's finished. I take her where ever she wants, her choice, well, after all, she's buying
It's like a light went off inside of Mom.
She's doing more things, socializing within her complex, participating in the different activities and eating in the dining room, FINALLY! Meals are extremely inexpensive for the residents and she seems to think that she can't afford to do that... WHAT?!
"MOM! you can eat in the dining room whenever you like, you can afford it! It's less than what some of these frozen meals cost, really!"
I got her monthly statement for her "room & board" yesterday, I figure last month she ate "out" as she's calling it, twice a week on average, that's pretty good. AND she's got new dining buddies too!
Their dining rooms are BYOB, so I bought her those little "one glass" bottles of her favorite wine to take and share.
View attachment 68058
(photo curtesy of instacart)
Now, can we talk about your clothes Mother?
My mom has long had a very simple hairstyle. I don't think she has ever had a "perm." She gets the salon at here senior community to cut her hair every few weeks, and she washes it herself in the sink in her apartment.
Mom's dining fees are pre-paid each month. At the start of the month, she has an amount to spend, and if she spends it all, and needs more, she pays for that. If she does not spend it all, she loses it. Every week, she tells my sister to buy her groceries for things like sandwiches and snacks, and my sister tells her she can get any sandwich she wants at the deli down the hall, and all kinds of snacks at the Bistro, and charge it to her account. Mom says, "But I don't want to spend the money if I can make it myself." And every week, my sister has to tell her that any money in her account that she doesn't spend is gone. She will never see that money again. We tell her, you left $175 in your account last month (or $180, $220... whatever), and mom says, "Oh my, I didn't know that. I should get sandwiches from the deli down the hall." An hour later, mom has completely forgotten what we've told her, and in a few days, gives my sister a new grocery list.
My mom can't remember what happened five minutes ago, but can remember things from fifty years ago in detail. It's frustrating.
BTW, I use those Sutter Home Sauvignon Blanc minis for cooking (including that coq au vin blanc that you like).
OP
OP
Kaneohegirlinaz
Wannabe TV Chef
@caseydog yeah ya know my Mom is the same ... forgets what I just said, but brings up things that happened 30-40 years ago to me ... for instance, we got quite a snow dump acoupla weeks ago and Mom brought up the first time I saw snow when I was visiting a friend in Chicago - MOM! That was over 40 years ago, where did that come from - I didn't actually say that to her, but I did tell DH that.
As for Mom's "food in apartment" situation, I spy on her every chance I get. I take note of what all she has on hand and I shop for her before she realizes that she needs it.
Her latest request has been toothpaste, like every week, MOM!!! What are you doing, eating the stuff... you have an extra tube in your bathroom vanity.
As for Mom's "food in apartment" situation, I spy on her every chance I get. I take note of what all she has on hand and I shop for her before she realizes that she needs it.
Her latest request has been toothpaste, like every week, MOM!!! What are you doing, eating the stuff... you have an extra tube in your bathroom vanity.
OP
OP
Kaneohegirlinaz
Wannabe TV Chef
@GilliAnne I don't know how I missed this, but I am completely self-taught.
OP
OP
Kaneohegirlinaz
Wannabe TV Chef
A couple of weeks ago my Mother asked me to make an appointment for her with the Eye Doctor ... "why Mom" ... she said that her eyes have really been bothering her and it was more than a year since her last check up.
I called over to the optometrist's office, made an appointment and also mentioned her eyes bothering her. They recommended that in the mean time, she was an OTC allergy eye drop. I found it on sale, cheap, at Costco.
I took Mom to her appointment this past Monday and the Doctor said that she has an infection in her right eye and prescribed antibiotic drops, so off to the pharmacy we went, no lunch out Mom- it's home with you.
I went over what she was to do with her antibiotic drops and deposited her back at her apartment.
I called her on Wednesday to check up on her, make sure that there was no reaction to the drops.
Mom: "NO! I'm fine! I'm following my instructions: one drop in each eye, four times a day"
Moi: Mom, it's just your right eye. That's what it says on the bottle.
Mom: I know what it says, but the doctor said I had an infection in both eyes.
Moi: No Mom, he didn't, it's just your right eye.
Mom continued to argue, so I said that I would pass this on to the doctor.
I spoke with Doctor and he totally understood where I was coming from. He said that elders sometimes hear and do what they want, it's okay, that won't hurt her left eye, just so long as she does it.
I picked Mom up today for your bi-weekly wash&style at the beauty parlor and both her eyes didn't look good in my non-professional opinion, but we'll she how she is next week.
If it's not better, I'm taking her back to the Doctor's office.
On an aside note: I FINALLY got Mom to buy a descent pair of REAL sunglasses!
She has been wearing THE MOST hideous dollar store/gas station glasses and they HAD TO GO!!!
Now, let's work on your wardrobe ...
I called over to the optometrist's office, made an appointment and also mentioned her eyes bothering her. They recommended that in the mean time, she was an OTC allergy eye drop. I found it on sale, cheap, at Costco.
I took Mom to her appointment this past Monday and the Doctor said that she has an infection in her right eye and prescribed antibiotic drops, so off to the pharmacy we went, no lunch out Mom- it's home with you.
I went over what she was to do with her antibiotic drops and deposited her back at her apartment.
I called her on Wednesday to check up on her, make sure that there was no reaction to the drops.
Mom: "NO! I'm fine! I'm following my instructions: one drop in each eye, four times a day"
Moi: Mom, it's just your right eye. That's what it says on the bottle.
Mom: I know what it says, but the doctor said I had an infection in both eyes.
Moi: No Mom, he didn't, it's just your right eye.
Mom continued to argue, so I said that I would pass this on to the doctor.
I spoke with Doctor and he totally understood where I was coming from. He said that elders sometimes hear and do what they want, it's okay, that won't hurt her left eye, just so long as she does it.
I picked Mom up today for your bi-weekly wash&style at the beauty parlor and both her eyes didn't look good in my non-professional opinion, but we'll she how she is next week.
If it's not better, I'm taking her back to the Doctor's office.
On an aside note: I FINALLY got Mom to buy a descent pair of REAL sunglasses!
She has been wearing THE MOST hideous dollar store/gas station glasses and they HAD TO GO!!!
Now, let's work on your wardrobe ...
My mom came home to her apartment today, from rehab at the hospital from her stroke.
She was able to dress herself, get in and out of her bed by herself, get around the apartment with her walker by herself, and make a sandwich by herself.
She and my sister did a test walk to the dining room, and she made it just fine.
So far, so good.
While she was in rehab, we removed a coffee table and area rug from the apartment, because it was a tripping hazard. She was okay with that. She now has a clear path on laminate flooring to get anywhere in the apartment.
CD
She was able to dress herself, get in and out of her bed by herself, get around the apartment with her walker by herself, and make a sandwich by herself.
She and my sister did a test walk to the dining room, and she made it just fine.
So far, so good.
While she was in rehab, we removed a coffee table and area rug from the apartment, because it was a tripping hazard. She was okay with that. She now has a clear path on laminate flooring to get anywhere in the apartment.
CD
GotGarlic
Chef Extraordinaire
I'm glad to hear that she's doing well.
Kgirl, hope her eyes are really getting better! And have fun with the wardrobe, LOL.
casey, that's very good news. Very happy she was OK with your apartment adjustments. So many just hate any changes at all.
casey, that's very good news. Very happy she was OK with your apartment adjustments. So many just hate any changes at all.
