Today's Funny

dragnlaw · Aug 26, 2024

My goal for 2020 was to lose 10 pounds. Only have 14 to go.

Ate salad for dinner. Mostly croutons and tomatoes. Really just one big round crouton covered with tomato sauce, and cheese. FINE, it was a pizza..... OK, I ate a pizza! Are you happy now?

medtran49 · Aug 26, 2024

dragnlaw said:
My goal for 2020 was to lose 10 pounds. Only have 14 to go.

Ate salad for dinner. Mostly croutons and tomatoes. Really just one big round crouton covered with tomato sauce, and cheese. FINE, it was a pizza..... OK, I ate a pizza! Are you happy now?

2020?

Kaneohegirlinaz · Aug 27, 2024

dragnlaw · Aug 27, 2024

medtran, I read it as 'goal in 2020' to lose 10 lb.
It's now 2024 and I only have 14 lb to go, no?

K'girl, I always suspected you were my sister!

dragnlaw · Aug 28, 2024

dragnlaw · Aug 30, 2024

Kathleen · Aug 30, 2024

@dragnlaw Secretariat's jockey supposedly told the woman that he ended up marrying "I'm taller when I am standing on my wallet" when he first met her.

dragnlaw · Aug 31, 2024

dragnlaw · Aug 31, 2024

Kaneohegirlinaz · Aug 31, 2024

Andy M. · Aug 31, 2024

I've reached that time in my life where it's no longer appropriate to use the word "untimely" in my obituary

Kathleen · Aug 31, 2024

Andy M. said:
I've reached that time in my life where it's no longer appropriate to use the word "untimely" in my obituary

Yes, but everyone should know to be kind to you because "Life in prison" is no longer a deterrent.

Andy M. · Sep 6, 2024

Kaneohegirlinaz · Sep 6, 2024

dragnlaw · Sep 6, 2024

K'girl! I hope you didn't take that picture from out your window!
That is just sooo funny!

Andy, you have no idea how many times I've said that!
On the farm during the spring thaw, the driveway would get very soft and cars and trucks left ruts. One year it was so bad I put across the drive some saw horses with the sign dégel
My bro came home and asked what it meant... I didn`t even realize I had used a french word and for the life of me could not think of the english word. All I could say was "Well, yuh know, when you take out an ice cube and leave it on the counter and it ... umm, you know... it melts?"