I think there is balance in this arrangement (the other way around in my case) and I would like my brother to agree. Sadly, he doesn't seem to appreciate the "balance" part of the arrangement.
He would if he wanted to eat in my house!
Craig and i started out with that agreement but it quickly became a whoever cooks also cleans. We cooked about 50/50, but I'm a pot/utensil reuser, clean as i go kind if cook. He wasn't
, so i would get left with a sink piled high with dishes and he'd have just our dinner dishes plus whatever pots/pans food was in. Let's put it this way, once he had to face a sink piled high over and over again, he became not a great reuser/clean as you go cook, but a much, much better one.
My DD and her ex also had the whoever cooks doesn't have to clean arrangement. He started not cleaning up when things began to go south with them and she was always complaining about it to me. Finally, i told her to quit doing the dishes and let them pile up even though a mess sitting around drove her crazy and even if it meant they ran out of dishes. Told her to get food for her and the girls out, buy paper plates and hide them so he couldn't use them, clean silverware as they needed. It took about 4 days. He started cleaning up after that. When he would backslide and start to leave them again, she would just let them sit and it might take him up to a day to get them done but never longer than that.
BTW, he did cook about 25% of the time and would start making comments about dishes needing to be done if they weren't cleaned up within a couple hours of dinner, but, if she did the same, he would get angry about being bothered . Many things like that and worse are why he is an ex.